in my last blog entry, i talked about how Warner Brothers had purchased Turbine, Inc., which was at the time the largest privately-owned online gaming studio. i talked about how Turbine took a dying MMO based upon a great IP (that would be Dungeons & Dragons Online) and resurrected it into a cash machine, and how this is likely the reason that Warner Brothers was interested in Turbine (as well as the fact that video game sales growth is greatly increasing while music and movie media are drastically decreasing). Warner Brothers' recent announcement regarding the future of Turbine's other (and arguably much greater) IP, Lord of the Rings Online, further perpetuates this line of thinking.
you see, it has been announced that Lord of the Rings Online will soon follow a similar free-to-play payment model as DDO, meaning premium content will be available for purchase in the new LotRO store, but anyone with 2 working brain cells can download the LotRO client, jump onto your server, and otherwise affect your Middle Earth experience without having to pay a dime (unless you hang out in Moria or Mirkwood exclusively, as the free content only allows players to level to 50... and you thought the higher level areas had lag issues before?).
while this was a great strategy for DDO, which was seconds away from its death rattle as an active MMO anyway (read = had nothing to lose), LotRO is populated mostly by people who have been there since the beginning (known as Founders; i was one) and have carved a fairly comfortable niche for themselves. they've seen the quality of their gameplay drop significantly to appease greater numbers of potential customers (not players, mind you), and they've still stuck around because they've gone beyond what the game itself offers and created something special in spite of what Turbine has done to Middle Earth, which is make the lower- and mid-level PvE content flavorless and trite, thus inciting any decent player (read = not a self-drooling moron) to engage in a race to the level cap where the somewhat better content is to be found. fortunately for those players, Turbine also dumbed down the quest difficulty and raised the XP ratio significantly, so racing through Middle Earth without actually looking around or taking a moment to even read the f*#@ing story inherent in the quests themselves became easier, albeit mind-numbingly boring... but what has Tolkien ever had to do with actual reading anyway?
now these same people who have been loyal to the game even though the quality of Turbine's gameplay, story-writing, and customer service has decreased drastically since the inception of the game have the minor inconvenience (read = massive headache and humiliation) of trying to figure out exactly what their $15/month means in LotRO Store Points. sure, i spent months leveling my crafting skill so i could make black dye which has always been a popular item on the Auction House, but will it now be available at the store for a few bucks to someone who just started the game yesterday? what exactly is the current exchange rate for in-game gold to LotRO points? ::sigh:: i can't begin to wrap my head around it, and i don't even play it anymore! if LotRO was still something in which i was emotionally invested, i'd be sending my characters to jump off of The Endless Stair right about now.
on that note, i feel quite sad for those original RPers who have populated some of the LotRO servers and, in turn, forged them into icons of old-school greatness. Landroval, for instance, has become one of the most famous (and arguably, most awesome) RP servers in MMO history. here's some footage from last year's Weatherstock music event (think Middle Earth meets Battle of the Bands... as i said, awesome!). when i was part of the LotRO beta test just before retail release, i stumbled upon someone playing the lute (example) and thought, "this is the greatest thing i've ever seen in-game!" the last time i logged in, however, the server on which i was playing (not Landroval) had become a haven of unfriendly leet-speakers and glorified xp-racers. i've never looked back, even though i still receive those free weekend invites.
i understand the paradox here... you need customers to keep the game running, but in order to get new customers to replace those who have left, you make changes to the game which, in turn, causes current players to leave. ::shrug:: i don't know the answer, and i'm no business expert. as far as i know, Turbine hasn't even covered the costs of development and maintenance of LotRO (it's rumored that Blizzard spent $200+ million to develop WoW and has spent that much to maintain it since it's release in 2004). i only know from my own perspective, which is that of a former player who has long since moved on.
my best wishes to those who still strive to make Middle Earth great; i do not envy your upcoming trials.
Still round the corner there may wait
A new road or a secret gate,
And though we pass them by today,
Tomorrow we may come this way
And take the hidden paths that run
Towards the Moon or to the Sun.
Thursday, June 10, 2010
Tuesday, April 20, 2010
i am not alone
looking over a few of my past entries, you've undoubtedly noticed a recurring theme:
1) i love gaming, and
2) gaming has grown stale.
yep, these two concurrent events might seem paradoxical, but they're nonetheless quite true.
a couple of things happened today which might help illuminate this subject from another perspective. the first is the letter of resignation from a WoW player named Muqq. First, a little background: Muqq has been playing World of Warcraft for five years now (read = exceptionally devoted), and has been a major community figure on Ensidia, an incredible example of a gaming fansite. Muqq has developed class guides, raid movies, and software performance guides for the general benefit of the WoW gaming community at large. in other words, he's a gaming hero, and one whose opinion should not be easily dismissed.
so, imagine my surprise when i stumbled upon Muqq's farewell to the land of Azeroth. i mean, this guy has put forth more effort than many professionals when it comes to collecting, organizing, and publishing data regarding WoW, and now he's quitting?!
how did this happen, you might ask?
it seems Muqq feels about WoW the same way i feel about the MMOs i've left. i won't blame you if you don't read his entire entry (he goes on longer than yours truly!), but here's an excerpt:
yep... the game industry has shifted their focus from game to industry. it's all about how to churn & burn the most money through the entertainment machine, with no attention whatsoever to the original concepts that made gaming the awesome experience it used to (and could still) be. difficulties have been (ridiculously) watered down, quests are written with no appreciation for the concepts of plot or characterization (who reads all that text anyway? just click "accept" and get back to the killing!), and character evolution has been replaced by a race to the level cap so you can join in the endless grind that is only epitomized by the never-ending crusade for phat lewt. if you can't keep interested the players who made your game the icon it has become, make it easier for the newbs to take their place.
upon the heels of this announcement, another seemingly unrelated event has occurred. Turbine, once the largest privately-owned MMO studio in North America and the company responsible for such industry greats as Asheron's Call, Lord of the Rings Online and the once near-death but now incredibly lucrative Dungeons & Dragons Online (which has made money hand over fist since the decision by Turbine to make the game free-to-play, a move which staggered many within the industry), has just been acquired by Warner Brothers Home Entertainment.
i'll let that sink in a moment.
the people who manipulated the creativity of artists like Frank Zappa and Prince now own a huge corner of the MMO business.
...
"hi, table for four?"
"yes, we have a reservation. the name is Horsemen of the Apocalypse?"
"ah, yes, right this way!"
what does the future hold for gaming? i have no idea. many great game concepts have come and gone, none of which really delivered upon their own potential for various reasons (or their own promises, for that matter). the games which are receiving the most funding seem to be those which most closely duplicate the models of those which have done well in the past, which is exactly why there are so many games out there that look (exactly!) like World of Warcraft. and why not? a quick web search will reveal many players who want exactly that: another game like the one which is already established (?).
unfortunately, it is the original gamer here who gets discarded. the focus is no longer on quality of entertainment, but how to draw in new memberships to replace those which are no longer active due to lack of long-term playability. ultimately, it's cheaper to lower the xp-to-lvl ratio than to retain superior writers, artists, and service staff, and like all great art forms, greed has taken hold.
guess i'll hold out for an independent company to come along and provide something completely fantastic and utterly innovative... the likes of which i can only hope will follow the footsteps of film and music. Reservoir Dogs Online, anyone?
"Art is making something out of nothing and selling it." - Frank Zappa (1940 - 1993)
1) i love gaming, and
2) gaming has grown stale.
yep, these two concurrent events might seem paradoxical, but they're nonetheless quite true.
a couple of things happened today which might help illuminate this subject from another perspective. the first is the letter of resignation from a WoW player named Muqq. First, a little background: Muqq has been playing World of Warcraft for five years now (read = exceptionally devoted), and has been a major community figure on Ensidia, an incredible example of a gaming fansite. Muqq has developed class guides, raid movies, and software performance guides for the general benefit of the WoW gaming community at large. in other words, he's a gaming hero, and one whose opinion should not be easily dismissed.
so, imagine my surprise when i stumbled upon Muqq's farewell to the land of Azeroth. i mean, this guy has put forth more effort than many professionals when it comes to collecting, organizing, and publishing data regarding WoW, and now he's quitting?!
how did this happen, you might ask?
it seems Muqq feels about WoW the same way i feel about the MMOs i've left. i won't blame you if you don't read his entire entry (he goes on longer than yours truly!), but here's an excerpt:
"...I think Blizzard have intentionally overlooked to adjust the game for their new target audience. In other words, the lack of character progression makes the game as it is today; boring, very boring. No amount of vanity pets, mounts, kill x, deliver y, collect z quests, mirrored instances, heroic instance zergs, arenas, battlegrounds and homogenized classes will change that fact. All to cater to an audience that won't be playing the game for more than 2-3 months at most.
The game philosophy has shifted, maybe due to the large turnover of players, or perhaps it might have been the reason causing it. Regardless, here we are today, playing a game with some of the best gameplay features any MMO has to offer, yet lacking the depth and character progression to go with it.
That leaves me here. With an account that's about to expire in a few days. This game is just not for me anymore. Perhaps I've grown to old, or perhaps I just have other things to do, but that's not really it. It's just not fun anymore, it hasn't been for a long time. I honestly can't see what other players are seeing in the game to keep them going, especially the veterans. It's not fun leveling an alt for the sixth or seventh time, it's not fun to raid either extremely toned down instances or doing heroic versions on my main, just to get an item a week for no real purpose other than to kill the boss a few seconds faster next week."
yep... the game industry has shifted their focus from game to industry. it's all about how to churn & burn the most money through the entertainment machine, with no attention whatsoever to the original concepts that made gaming the awesome experience it used to (and could still) be. difficulties have been (ridiculously) watered down, quests are written with no appreciation for the concepts of plot or characterization (who reads all that text anyway? just click "accept" and get back to the killing!), and character evolution has been replaced by a race to the level cap so you can join in the endless grind that is only epitomized by the never-ending crusade for phat lewt. if you can't keep interested the players who made your game the icon it has become, make it easier for the newbs to take their place.
upon the heels of this announcement, another seemingly unrelated event has occurred. Turbine, once the largest privately-owned MMO studio in North America and the company responsible for such industry greats as Asheron's Call, Lord of the Rings Online and the once near-death but now incredibly lucrative Dungeons & Dragons Online (which has made money hand over fist since the decision by Turbine to make the game free-to-play, a move which staggered many within the industry), has just been acquired by Warner Brothers Home Entertainment.
i'll let that sink in a moment.
the people who manipulated the creativity of artists like Frank Zappa and Prince now own a huge corner of the MMO business.
...
"hi, table for four?"
"yes, we have a reservation. the name is Horsemen of the Apocalypse?"
"ah, yes, right this way!"
what does the future hold for gaming? i have no idea. many great game concepts have come and gone, none of which really delivered upon their own potential for various reasons (or their own promises, for that matter). the games which are receiving the most funding seem to be those which most closely duplicate the models of those which have done well in the past, which is exactly why there are so many games out there that look (exactly!) like World of Warcraft. and why not? a quick web search will reveal many players who want exactly that: another game like the one which is already established (?).
unfortunately, it is the original gamer here who gets discarded. the focus is no longer on quality of entertainment, but how to draw in new memberships to replace those which are no longer active due to lack of long-term playability. ultimately, it's cheaper to lower the xp-to-lvl ratio than to retain superior writers, artists, and service staff, and like all great art forms, greed has taken hold.
guess i'll hold out for an independent company to come along and provide something completely fantastic and utterly innovative... the likes of which i can only hope will follow the footsteps of film and music. Reservoir Dogs Online, anyone?
"Art is making something out of nothing and selling it." - Frank Zappa (1940 - 1993)
Friday, April 16, 2010
LARPers fight back (sort of)
seriously, folks, it's not our fault.
i'm speaking to those of you who engage in live action roleplay (LARP, for short), from those of us who do not. first, allow me to say that i have nothing against LARP, or those who engage in these activities. as much of a fantasy/literature/gamer/geek nut that i am, you'd think i would have gotten into something like this by now (and, honestly, if i lived in Europe where LARP is much more prevalent, i probably would have), but i haven't. even though i'm not into LARP, i don't put down or think less of those who are. seriously. there's enough in this world that actually deserves to be ridiculed...
but here is my point: much of what is presented by the LARP community (in the West, anyway), falls into a category many believe is worthy of ridicule. to make matters worse, i don't really see those within the LARP community doing anything to change that.
the impetus behind this article is an email i received from Alltern8.com, which touts themselves as 'the biggest online community for the world of console games, MMOs, LARP, comics, & CCG games' (in all fairness, i subscribe to it). yeah, nerdery abound! ::shrug:: hey, if the shoe fits, subscribe to its monthly newsletters. besides, they got me into the semi-open beta testing of Star Trek Online without preordering the game, which equaled free server time on a high-quality MMORPG... you can't beat that with a morningstar (or a Plasma Sniper Mk X, as the case may be). anyway, the subject of this month's LARP article is fighting stereotypes which those of us who don't LARP might have (read = probably have) about those who do. this is an admirable topic of discussion, and one which i had hoped would be interesting. let's be realistic for a moment: most people in the US who don't engage in LARP aren't conveniently receiving emails regarding the topic, so this article was written for an audience who LARPs. i understood that i was the outsider when i began to read, but many similarities exist between myself and the LARP community at large. i love all things fantasy, i enjoy roleplaying games, and i love to battle with foam & latex weapons.
"wait... um... hey Grey, i thought you said you don't LARP..."
i don't. allow me to explain the difference before moving on.
you see, fantasy literature includes all things from The Odyssey and Beowulf to the works of H. P. Lovecraft and Robert E. Howard to the more recently popularized epic fantasy of J. R. R. Tolkien and George R. R. Martin. nothing but absolute magnificence in these examples, and there are many more examples of wonderful fantasy literature out there. not to mention science fiction, but i will resist the urge to continue down this tract and remain on subject.
this is not easy for me. ::deep breath::
ok, where were we? oh, right...
roleplaying games, which originally evolved directly from fantasy literature, take the genre to the next level by allowing the participant to not only imagine an author's protagonist living out a specifically written plot scenario, but to create his (or hers, i'm not trying to be sexist here... just going to stick with the masculine for the rest of the article because 1) i don't like it when an author continues to say "his/hers" throughout paragraphs of text and 2) another honesty check: this realm was created by and has been dominated by males since its creation; i'm the first to admit, however, that this has changed in recent history, and i'm of the opinion that this change is definitely one for the better) own protagonist and make his own choices about the actions and interactions in an (attempted, anyway) equally rich fantasy setting. beginning with the games of one Gary Gygax, including the amazing Dungeons & Dragons, these games became the front runner of a class of interactive entertainment (and media) which is still influencing modern entertainment today. in fact, most (like 99%) of all video games ever created either borrowed or directly stole ideas and/or concepts from D&D, like hit points, damage rolls (crit ftw!), and the entire implementation of character class. if you've ever played a video game besides PacMan and Farmville, you owe Mr. Gygax a huge heap of gratitude.
live battle play... this can definitely enter a gray area which could coincide with LARP, if not directly stand within the same context. there are differences, however. the combat which i enjoy is based solely upon actual weapons combat, period. a group of people wielding realistic weapons converge to "kill" those around them. ::sigh:: this particular group shown in the linked video, Barbarian Battles, was begun by a man named Jim Gasser, the greatest fighter i'd ever met. it is with no small amount of sorrow that i must say he is no longer with us, and i still (and probably will forever) miss him greatly.
"so, wait... what's the difference between that and LARP?"
i'm glad you asked. the difference to the untrained eye might be negligible, but i assure you it's more than i've ever cared to traverse.
there are various examples of LARP to be found on the 'net. most of them are, shall we say, less than flattering. for instance, you've got the famous Lighting Bolt video. there's the trailer for the upcoming movie, Monster Camp. not to mention The LARP Rap. you see, i don't dress in medieval garb, call myself 'Dorn of the Dragon Mountains,' and spend time manufacturing various bags of multicolored rice to throw at people while shouting spell names. i just like to beat on people with fake weapons. big difference.
now, back to the subject at hand. this article goes on to discuss how to broach the subject of LARPing when someone who doesn't LARP (read = someone "normal") asks (read = griefs) you about being a LARPer. nothing really unusual in the article, except that the author expects anyone in this situation to remember that they are 'representing the entire LARP community' via their responses and actions in such a situation.
no pressure...
however, a look around some of the other articles for the LARP community on this particular website paints what is probably a more accurate picture of the group of people whom we are discussing. for instance, the article on LARP dating is a bit more realistic than merely communicating that LARPers are just non-LARPers with style. here's an excerpt:
"Most players when they think about the stress of carrying on a conversation do not even think of forming a relationship with someone unless they can call to trade Magic cards."
um, seriously? you're not talking about an average Joe here... you're talking about someone who suffers from severe nerddom. sure, anyone can be a little apprehensive when meeting new people, especially when that new person happens to be an attractive member of the opposite sex (or same sex, whatever... i don't judge). but describing the people in this situation as being "two people that are use to interacting with a screen between themselves and humanity" doesn't really bode well for creating a connection with the general public.
in other words, LARPers of Alltern8, get your story straight. it's great that you're trying to overcome the stereotypes which the rest of the world holds for your hobby (obsession, whatever... i don't judge). but you won't be able to do that if you're simultaneously living up to those exact same stereotypes.
i'm speaking to those of you who engage in live action roleplay (LARP, for short), from those of us who do not. first, allow me to say that i have nothing against LARP, or those who engage in these activities. as much of a fantasy/literature/gamer/geek nut that i am, you'd think i would have gotten into something like this by now (and, honestly, if i lived in Europe where LARP is much more prevalent, i probably would have), but i haven't. even though i'm not into LARP, i don't put down or think less of those who are. seriously. there's enough in this world that actually deserves to be ridiculed...
but here is my point: much of what is presented by the LARP community (in the West, anyway), falls into a category many believe is worthy of ridicule. to make matters worse, i don't really see those within the LARP community doing anything to change that.
the impetus behind this article is an email i received from Alltern8.com, which touts themselves as 'the biggest online community for the world of console games, MMOs, LARP, comics, & CCG games' (in all fairness, i subscribe to it). yeah, nerdery abound! ::shrug:: hey, if the shoe fits, subscribe to its monthly newsletters. besides, they got me into the semi-open beta testing of Star Trek Online without preordering the game, which equaled free server time on a high-quality MMORPG... you can't beat that with a morningstar (or a Plasma Sniper Mk X, as the case may be). anyway, the subject of this month's LARP article is fighting stereotypes which those of us who don't LARP might have (read = probably have) about those who do. this is an admirable topic of discussion, and one which i had hoped would be interesting. let's be realistic for a moment: most people in the US who don't engage in LARP aren't conveniently receiving emails regarding the topic, so this article was written for an audience who LARPs. i understood that i was the outsider when i began to read, but many similarities exist between myself and the LARP community at large. i love all things fantasy, i enjoy roleplaying games, and i love to battle with foam & latex weapons.
"wait... um... hey Grey, i thought you said you don't LARP..."
i don't. allow me to explain the difference before moving on.
you see, fantasy literature includes all things from The Odyssey and Beowulf to the works of H. P. Lovecraft and Robert E. Howard to the more recently popularized epic fantasy of J. R. R. Tolkien and George R. R. Martin. nothing but absolute magnificence in these examples, and there are many more examples of wonderful fantasy literature out there. not to mention science fiction, but i will resist the urge to continue down this tract and remain on subject.
this is not easy for me. ::deep breath::
ok, where were we? oh, right...
roleplaying games, which originally evolved directly from fantasy literature, take the genre to the next level by allowing the participant to not only imagine an author's protagonist living out a specifically written plot scenario, but to create his (or hers, i'm not trying to be sexist here... just going to stick with the masculine for the rest of the article because 1) i don't like it when an author continues to say "his/hers" throughout paragraphs of text and 2) another honesty check: this realm was created by and has been dominated by males since its creation; i'm the first to admit, however, that this has changed in recent history, and i'm of the opinion that this change is definitely one for the better) own protagonist and make his own choices about the actions and interactions in an (attempted, anyway) equally rich fantasy setting. beginning with the games of one Gary Gygax, including the amazing Dungeons & Dragons, these games became the front runner of a class of interactive entertainment (and media) which is still influencing modern entertainment today. in fact, most (like 99%) of all video games ever created either borrowed or directly stole ideas and/or concepts from D&D, like hit points, damage rolls (crit ftw!), and the entire implementation of character class. if you've ever played a video game besides PacMan and Farmville, you owe Mr. Gygax a huge heap of gratitude.
live battle play... this can definitely enter a gray area which could coincide with LARP, if not directly stand within the same context. there are differences, however. the combat which i enjoy is based solely upon actual weapons combat, period. a group of people wielding realistic weapons converge to "kill" those around them. ::sigh:: this particular group shown in the linked video, Barbarian Battles, was begun by a man named Jim Gasser, the greatest fighter i'd ever met. it is with no small amount of sorrow that i must say he is no longer with us, and i still (and probably will forever) miss him greatly.
"so, wait... what's the difference between that and LARP?"
i'm glad you asked. the difference to the untrained eye might be negligible, but i assure you it's more than i've ever cared to traverse.
there are various examples of LARP to be found on the 'net. most of them are, shall we say, less than flattering. for instance, you've got the famous Lighting Bolt video. there's the trailer for the upcoming movie, Monster Camp. not to mention The LARP Rap. you see, i don't dress in medieval garb, call myself 'Dorn of the Dragon Mountains,' and spend time manufacturing various bags of multicolored rice to throw at people while shouting spell names. i just like to beat on people with fake weapons. big difference.
now, back to the subject at hand. this article goes on to discuss how to broach the subject of LARPing when someone who doesn't LARP (read = someone "normal") asks (read = griefs) you about being a LARPer. nothing really unusual in the article, except that the author expects anyone in this situation to remember that they are 'representing the entire LARP community' via their responses and actions in such a situation.
no pressure...
however, a look around some of the other articles for the LARP community on this particular website paints what is probably a more accurate picture of the group of people whom we are discussing. for instance, the article on LARP dating is a bit more realistic than merely communicating that LARPers are just non-LARPers with style. here's an excerpt:
"Most players when they think about the stress of carrying on a conversation do not even think of forming a relationship with someone unless they can call to trade Magic cards."
um, seriously? you're not talking about an average Joe here... you're talking about someone who suffers from severe nerddom. sure, anyone can be a little apprehensive when meeting new people, especially when that new person happens to be an attractive member of the opposite sex (or same sex, whatever... i don't judge). but describing the people in this situation as being "two people that are use to interacting with a screen between themselves and humanity" doesn't really bode well for creating a connection with the general public.
in other words, LARPers of Alltern8, get your story straight. it's great that you're trying to overcome the stereotypes which the rest of the world holds for your hobby (obsession, whatever... i don't judge). but you won't be able to do that if you're simultaneously living up to those exact same stereotypes.
Wednesday, March 24, 2010
'gamer' defined
A couple events led up to my writing this. the first is that i met someone through a mutual friend that claimed to be a 'gamer.' being a gamer myself, i asked the obvious question: "what are you playing?"
the response: "Farmville."
...
No.
::shakes head vigorously::
No, no, no... no.
Now, before all you Farmville people get all riled up, allow me to explain.
My friends and i have been referring to ourselves as 'gamers' long before the Internet became publicly available. We gathered, often at the scorn of others, in basements, barns, and other less-than-social venues to perpetuate our chosen hobby (or obsession, depending on the perspective). These were often male-dominated (if not exclusive) rites of passage, of which there are very few left in this modern era. It not only required research (books and books of it, in fact), but also proper equipment and a spirit which balanced competition and teamwork.
Now gaming has evolved into something much more advanced, which (naturally) requires more advanced equipment. This is still a male-dominated hobby, but females have become more prevalent in recent years (which, of course, rocks). While girl gamer groups and websites aren't hard to find these days, there is still something inherently male about PC gaming, and a recent article published in Men's Health magazine by Pulitzer Prize winner & car enthusiast Dan Neil helps to shed light on this phenomenon (his article is about cars, of course, but many parallels exist between cars and computers). According to Neil, a recent University of Minnesota study indicates 2 reasons why men crave "wheel time," (or, in the case of a virtual universe, "screen time"): the assertion of masculinity through technology and the appeal of being in control of our own destiny. The latter may even be more appropriate to online gaming in that the options available in MMORPGs for a person to customize and "create" their own avatar according to their personal play style is far greater than a person's ability to maneuver through traffic or choose their destination. Machines also do not require emotional intelligence, instead being finite and orderly systems of electronics and steel. Machines (as well as game characters) are also perfectible, allowing us to "impose order, completeness, perfection" in an imperfect world. I know i've certainly spent some time perfecting PCs in the past (my current configuration, if you're interested, can be viewed at the bottom of this page). In other words, we can manipulate something with our hands, our efforts, our time, which not only offers challenge and exhibits originality, but also offers a sort of harmony between ourselves and the world in which we live (deep, huh?).
"does this have anything to do with gaming?"
it does, and thanks for your patience. you see, i've spent almost as many hours researching, practicing, and upgrading/building my PC as i have actually playing games. that's commitment. this person i met, this self-titled "gamer" who plays Farmville? do you think they've spent hundreds of hours configuring their PC? modifying various components, applications, and network connectivity for maximum performance? or did they just log onto the 'net and open their web browser?
there's more. anyone who's played any amount of time in an MMO has probably experienced hours upon hours of just in-game preparation for some other, greater event. gathering materials to level crafting abilities to make better weapons, armor, potions, etc. researching PvP tactics versus specific archetypes. generating character builds to determine which skills and stats produce a more effective result. waiting for that last member of your pick-up group to finally show up so you can begin the quest you wanted to start an hour ago, only to have another member of your group have to leave unexpectedly halfway through (almost always the healer or the tank), forcing you to start all over again or call it quits, only to repeat the process again on another day. can you honestly tell me someone playing Farmville has tried to organize a PUG? lead a raid? do they even have DPS in Farmville?! of course not.
so, i decided to do a search for the term 'gamer.' i was shocked to discover my result. certainly, browser games, even those found on Facebook, are technically video games, and thus those who play them are technically gamers (by a very loose definition of the term). but what did i find when i typed "gamer" into the ol' search bar? i got this.
"There are many categories of games, including simple games such as Tetris, role-playing games (RPGs) such as Dungeons and Dragons, and hugely popular games such as Quake?" are you freakin' kidding me? this definition hasn't been updated since 2002?! this is shameful, especially considering the incredible growth of the video game industry over the last decade. i expected something which gamers could be proud of, not something as dated as Quake!
Wikipedia does a slightly better job of defining this term; at least they specify that there are genres of gaming like hardcores, casuals, and newbs, but even this doesn't really communicate the varied intricacies of the gaming world. by many gamers' definition, i am considered a 'casual' because, quite frankly, i consider my family to be a higher priority than my gaming (i know, ghastly, isn't it?). i only play 20 or so hours a week, depending on what else is going on at the time and how much sleep i feel prepared to sacrifice. now, ask a Farmville player how much time they put in. i imagine that someone who plays Farmville for 20 hours a week would not be considered 'casual' by his Farmville-playing peers. i'm not trying to justify those people who pour their entire waking life into a video game (i've seen some log over 70 hours a week, here's one for example). but you gotta admit, that's commitment.
i guess that's why i took offense to someone who plays an embedded browser game while checking their Facebook friends' status calling himself a gamer. there's no risk, no real effort there. when i begin a new MMO, for instance, i'll research various aspects of the game for hours before i even log in. Farmville takes what? a few minutes to learn?
gaming is a hobby, but it's one that we gamers tend to take pretty seriously, even we 'casuals' who prefer to be good fathers and supportive husbands over having every character slot at the level cap in uber gear. it's more than just a decision to kill a few minutes while i'm goofing off at work or waiting for the microwave to ding. for some of us, it even opens up viable real world skills which can be implemented in a new career. one guy even turned a $26,500 virtual investment (yes, real-world currency) into a six-figure income! how about that, Farmville? have you inspired anyone to take on a new direction in their lives, become farmers, and achieve lucrative results? i doubt it. in fact, i'll bet people have spent more money on Farm Coins than i spend a month on a game that's actually well-detailed and complex ($15/month is the going rate for commercial MMOs, while many are free-to-play).
do i sound proud? heh, probably. but compare Farmville to a game like World of Warcraft or the incredibly complex world of EVE (which probably has the steepest learning curve of any video game to date, as illustrated by this graphic), and you'll understand why we might consider ourselves a different crowd from those who play browser games.
the response: "Farmville."
...
No.
::shakes head vigorously::
No, no, no... no.
Now, before all you Farmville people get all riled up, allow me to explain.
My friends and i have been referring to ourselves as 'gamers' long before the Internet became publicly available. We gathered, often at the scorn of others, in basements, barns, and other less-than-social venues to perpetuate our chosen hobby (or obsession, depending on the perspective). These were often male-dominated (if not exclusive) rites of passage, of which there are very few left in this modern era. It not only required research (books and books of it, in fact), but also proper equipment and a spirit which balanced competition and teamwork.
Now gaming has evolved into something much more advanced, which (naturally) requires more advanced equipment. This is still a male-dominated hobby, but females have become more prevalent in recent years (which, of course, rocks). While girl gamer groups and websites aren't hard to find these days, there is still something inherently male about PC gaming, and a recent article published in Men's Health magazine by Pulitzer Prize winner & car enthusiast Dan Neil helps to shed light on this phenomenon (his article is about cars, of course, but many parallels exist between cars and computers). According to Neil, a recent University of Minnesota study indicates 2 reasons why men crave "wheel time," (or, in the case of a virtual universe, "screen time"): the assertion of masculinity through technology and the appeal of being in control of our own destiny. The latter may even be more appropriate to online gaming in that the options available in MMORPGs for a person to customize and "create" their own avatar according to their personal play style is far greater than a person's ability to maneuver through traffic or choose their destination. Machines also do not require emotional intelligence, instead being finite and orderly systems of electronics and steel. Machines (as well as game characters) are also perfectible, allowing us to "impose order, completeness, perfection" in an imperfect world. I know i've certainly spent some time perfecting PCs in the past (my current configuration, if you're interested, can be viewed at the bottom of this page). In other words, we can manipulate something with our hands, our efforts, our time, which not only offers challenge and exhibits originality, but also offers a sort of harmony between ourselves and the world in which we live (deep, huh?).
"does this have anything to do with gaming?"
it does, and thanks for your patience. you see, i've spent almost as many hours researching, practicing, and upgrading/building my PC as i have actually playing games. that's commitment. this person i met, this self-titled "gamer" who plays Farmville? do you think they've spent hundreds of hours configuring their PC? modifying various components, applications, and network connectivity for maximum performance? or did they just log onto the 'net and open their web browser?
there's more. anyone who's played any amount of time in an MMO has probably experienced hours upon hours of just in-game preparation for some other, greater event. gathering materials to level crafting abilities to make better weapons, armor, potions, etc. researching PvP tactics versus specific archetypes. generating character builds to determine which skills and stats produce a more effective result. waiting for that last member of your pick-up group to finally show up so you can begin the quest you wanted to start an hour ago, only to have another member of your group have to leave unexpectedly halfway through (almost always the healer or the tank), forcing you to start all over again or call it quits, only to repeat the process again on another day. can you honestly tell me someone playing Farmville has tried to organize a PUG? lead a raid? do they even have DPS in Farmville?! of course not.
so, i decided to do a search for the term 'gamer.' i was shocked to discover my result. certainly, browser games, even those found on Facebook, are technically video games, and thus those who play them are technically gamers (by a very loose definition of the term). but what did i find when i typed "gamer" into the ol' search bar? i got this.
"There are many categories of games, including simple games such as Tetris, role-playing games (RPGs) such as Dungeons and Dragons, and hugely popular games such as Quake?" are you freakin' kidding me? this definition hasn't been updated since 2002?! this is shameful, especially considering the incredible growth of the video game industry over the last decade. i expected something which gamers could be proud of, not something as dated as Quake!
Wikipedia does a slightly better job of defining this term; at least they specify that there are genres of gaming like hardcores, casuals, and newbs, but even this doesn't really communicate the varied intricacies of the gaming world. by many gamers' definition, i am considered a 'casual' because, quite frankly, i consider my family to be a higher priority than my gaming (i know, ghastly, isn't it?). i only play 20 or so hours a week, depending on what else is going on at the time and how much sleep i feel prepared to sacrifice. now, ask a Farmville player how much time they put in. i imagine that someone who plays Farmville for 20 hours a week would not be considered 'casual' by his Farmville-playing peers. i'm not trying to justify those people who pour their entire waking life into a video game (i've seen some log over 70 hours a week, here's one for example). but you gotta admit, that's commitment.
i guess that's why i took offense to someone who plays an embedded browser game while checking their Facebook friends' status calling himself a gamer. there's no risk, no real effort there. when i begin a new MMO, for instance, i'll research various aspects of the game for hours before i even log in. Farmville takes what? a few minutes to learn?
gaming is a hobby, but it's one that we gamers tend to take pretty seriously, even we 'casuals' who prefer to be good fathers and supportive husbands over having every character slot at the level cap in uber gear. it's more than just a decision to kill a few minutes while i'm goofing off at work or waiting for the microwave to ding. for some of us, it even opens up viable real world skills which can be implemented in a new career. one guy even turned a $26,500 virtual investment (yes, real-world currency) into a six-figure income! how about that, Farmville? have you inspired anyone to take on a new direction in their lives, become farmers, and achieve lucrative results? i doubt it. in fact, i'll bet people have spent more money on Farm Coins than i spend a month on a game that's actually well-detailed and complex ($15/month is the going rate for commercial MMOs, while many are free-to-play).
do i sound proud? heh, probably. but compare Farmville to a game like World of Warcraft or the incredibly complex world of EVE (which probably has the steepest learning curve of any video game to date, as illustrated by this graphic), and you'll understand why we might consider ourselves a different crowd from those who play browser games.
Thursday, March 11, 2010
humility
today i went in for (yet) another job interview. i also happen to be suffering from (yet) another cold. this was a recipe for disaster.
i have never felt like such an imbecile in my life. i could blame it on the DayQuil, or the lack of preparation, or lack of sleep, or any number of things... but making excuses is not my forté. bottom line, it sucked like a starving lamprey.
yeah, maybe it shouldn't bother me so much. but for a brief moment, i was a moron. and, for me, that's one brief moment too much.
i have never felt like such an imbecile in my life. i could blame it on the DayQuil, or the lack of preparation, or lack of sleep, or any number of things... but making excuses is not my forté. bottom line, it sucked like a starving lamprey.
yeah, maybe it shouldn't bother me so much. but for a brief moment, i was a moron. and, for me, that's one brief moment too much.
Sunday, February 14, 2010
things to do while you're sick
i'll avoid detailing the obvious activities which accompany being physically impaired by some kind of evil retrovirus, like hacking, groaning, and trying your best to sleep it off while you're 3-year-old bounces on your chest demanding Spiderman gummy vitamins and your 3-month-old incessantly (albeit happily) squawks having only recently discovered her voluntary control over her vocal cords.
...not to mention my poor wife who had to deal with these two mostly on her own while i attempted to recuperate in some semblance of peace. it's something of a miracle i wasn't gutted while i slept, but again this probably had a bit to do with the chest-bouncing 3-year-old (he's old enough now to be a viable witness).
now that i'm beginning to feel a little better, i'm looking back at the past few days in amazement that i actually accomplished as much as i have. besides sleeping as much as is humanly possible given the above conditions, i've actually gotten some things done. and i'm not talking about your run-of-the-mill stuff you normally do while you're feeling a bit under the weather.
i'm talking about things most people despise doing even when they're feeling at their best, much less when they're choking back death as i felt i've been doing for the past 72 hours.
#1) taxes - that's right, the joy that is income tax preparation is one that no human being really looks upon with wanton anticipation, even if they are expecting a healthy refund from good ol' Uncle Sam. i prepared our federal and state forms in one setting, requiring only 2 cups of coffee, 2 extra-strength Tylenol, and 2 Benadryl to do so.
#2) website renewal - for those of you who have never attempted to set up your own website, or have only renewed one by clicking the "sure, bill me again for more money than it's really worth" button and hitting "Submit," this surely sounds like no major feat. i am not of that category, mind you. my original domain host is great for customer service and server reliability, but they recently upped my monthly fee from $5 (which i thought was a bit high to begin with) to $8 (which is half the cost of an MMO subscription, read = outrageous). so, after deciding last month that i didn't really need a website anyway, i realized i missed it. not "$8/month missed it," but i missed it nonetheless. so, while i was purging my system in ways i would only do my readers a horrible disservice by describing in detail, i decided i would try to find a more affordable solution to my website hosting needs. upon finally discovering a site (a free site without ads, by the way) which seemed to manage both reliability and functionality, i had to figure out how to get my original service transferred to the new site. my original service, however, still owns my domain name for the next year... which is quite affordable. it's their web hosting that's gotten overpriced... ::sigh:: i digress. needless to say, this was a process with which i'm unfamiliar, as a simple domain transfer would have been much easier. but, as mentioned before, i'm cheap when it comes to these things, and since i've already paid for another year of my domain name, i'm not going to purchase it again until absolutely necessary (exactly 346 days from today). after having cleared this hurdle, it was time to upload my webpages to the new site, which for some reason didn't like my .css file. that was probably another hour of troubleshooting. lo and behold! the task has since been accomplished, and my original website will be up again as soon as the stupid host domain servers reset my nameserver preference to the new web host company.
#3) enjoy a few moments of creativity between shouts from your son from his upstairs bedroom, "can i get up NOW?!" - yep, i not only get to bask in my accomplishments, but i get to record them here for all to see (read = pretty much just me). and now it's time to unleash the beautiful disaster that is my son from the somewhat stable confines of his bedroom so that he may continue to bounce on my chest and otherwise prove that he is, in every detail, his father's boy.
edit: previously, i had stated that Klingons and Vulcans wouldn't "do it," in reference to Star Trek Online. this was a considerably poor conclusion jump on my part, i must admit. i had read quite a bit about the upcoming release of this Cryptic MMO, and thought i knew what i was talking about. i was fortunate enough to get into the open beta test for this game, however, and was pleasantly set straight by the kind folks at Cryptic Development. this game was a blast, much more fun than i thought it would be. will it be the MMO that turns my opinion of all MMOs around for good? of course not; my previous admissions regarding my opinions of MMOs were based upon my realizations of my own personality and my evolution as a human being, a family man, and a gamer. many MMOs still rely (and, thanks to the ridiculously successful model those guys at Blizzard have created, will continue to rely) upon a very similar structure, one which will never be repeated as well as the original, nor should it be. just because a 4-door sedan is the most popular style of automobile in the US, it doesn't mean i don't enjoy riding my bike. STO does a few things very differently, and while it's not the perfect game, it has all the characteristics of a wonderful distraction, although admittedly it will likely be a temporary one. thanks again, Cryptic, and sorry i almost blew your game off before trying it. i won't make that mistake again.
...not to mention my poor wife who had to deal with these two mostly on her own while i attempted to recuperate in some semblance of peace. it's something of a miracle i wasn't gutted while i slept, but again this probably had a bit to do with the chest-bouncing 3-year-old (he's old enough now to be a viable witness).
now that i'm beginning to feel a little better, i'm looking back at the past few days in amazement that i actually accomplished as much as i have. besides sleeping as much as is humanly possible given the above conditions, i've actually gotten some things done. and i'm not talking about your run-of-the-mill stuff you normally do while you're feeling a bit under the weather.
i'm talking about things most people despise doing even when they're feeling at their best, much less when they're choking back death as i felt i've been doing for the past 72 hours.
#1) taxes - that's right, the joy that is income tax preparation is one that no human being really looks upon with wanton anticipation, even if they are expecting a healthy refund from good ol' Uncle Sam. i prepared our federal and state forms in one setting, requiring only 2 cups of coffee, 2 extra-strength Tylenol, and 2 Benadryl to do so.
#2) website renewal - for those of you who have never attempted to set up your own website, or have only renewed one by clicking the "sure, bill me again for more money than it's really worth" button and hitting "Submit," this surely sounds like no major feat. i am not of that category, mind you. my original domain host is great for customer service and server reliability, but they recently upped my monthly fee from $5 (which i thought was a bit high to begin with) to $8 (which is half the cost of an MMO subscription, read = outrageous). so, after deciding last month that i didn't really need a website anyway, i realized i missed it. not "$8/month missed it," but i missed it nonetheless. so, while i was purging my system in ways i would only do my readers a horrible disservice by describing in detail, i decided i would try to find a more affordable solution to my website hosting needs. upon finally discovering a site (a free site without ads, by the way) which seemed to manage both reliability and functionality, i had to figure out how to get my original service transferred to the new site. my original service, however, still owns my domain name for the next year... which is quite affordable. it's their web hosting that's gotten overpriced... ::sigh:: i digress. needless to say, this was a process with which i'm unfamiliar, as a simple domain transfer would have been much easier. but, as mentioned before, i'm cheap when it comes to these things, and since i've already paid for another year of my domain name, i'm not going to purchase it again until absolutely necessary (exactly 346 days from today). after having cleared this hurdle, it was time to upload my webpages to the new site, which for some reason didn't like my .css file. that was probably another hour of troubleshooting. lo and behold! the task has since been accomplished, and my original website will be up again as soon as the stupid host domain servers reset my nameserver preference to the new web host company.
#3) enjoy a few moments of creativity between shouts from your son from his upstairs bedroom, "can i get up NOW?!" - yep, i not only get to bask in my accomplishments, but i get to record them here for all to see (read = pretty much just me). and now it's time to unleash the beautiful disaster that is my son from the somewhat stable confines of his bedroom so that he may continue to bounce on my chest and otherwise prove that he is, in every detail, his father's boy.
edit: previously, i had stated that Klingons and Vulcans wouldn't "do it," in reference to Star Trek Online. this was a considerably poor conclusion jump on my part, i must admit. i had read quite a bit about the upcoming release of this Cryptic MMO, and thought i knew what i was talking about. i was fortunate enough to get into the open beta test for this game, however, and was pleasantly set straight by the kind folks at Cryptic Development. this game was a blast, much more fun than i thought it would be. will it be the MMO that turns my opinion of all MMOs around for good? of course not; my previous admissions regarding my opinions of MMOs were based upon my realizations of my own personality and my evolution as a human being, a family man, and a gamer. many MMOs still rely (and, thanks to the ridiculously successful model those guys at Blizzard have created, will continue to rely) upon a very similar structure, one which will never be repeated as well as the original, nor should it be. just because a 4-door sedan is the most popular style of automobile in the US, it doesn't mean i don't enjoy riding my bike. STO does a few things very differently, and while it's not the perfect game, it has all the characteristics of a wonderful distraction, although admittedly it will likely be a temporary one. thanks again, Cryptic, and sorry i almost blew your game off before trying it. i won't make that mistake again.
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
introspection
my life is pretty busy these days. a beautiful wife, 2 kids, a full-time job, and trying to find a new job which corresponds with my IT degree take a lot of time. and when i'm not spending my time husbanding, parenting, working, and sending out resumes, i game (which can take a lot of time by itself, but fortunately i need very little sleep). so some might say i game a lot.
::shrug::
it takes my mind off of the rejection letters i keep getting.
i currently have 3 games i've been going between, all of which are single-player RPGs, so we're talking a lot of content in each. i'll probably complete most, if not all, of the content in all of them eventually, but i've come to the realization that my personality houses a bit of a paradox. i like to complete things, but i get bored when i do the same thing repeatedly.
this is exactly why i've grown stale on MMOs. it's impossible to complete an MMO, and you inevitably end up doing the exact same thing ad infinitum. it never starts that way, mind you. you get a shiny new universe with a shiny new avatar and a shiny new set of powers, with (more importantly) a shiny new set of abilities and/or gear to work towards. that last one is the hook, what the game developers hope will keep you coming back (and paying next month's subscription fee). so you begin happily enough, and they throw enough new stuff at you early on so that you've got new things to do and new spells/powers/skills to use while doing those new things to keep you very pleasantly occupied. after a while, though, the acquisition of your character's new upgrades decreases, and you become more aware of the repetition of the tasks you're doing in-game. the more MMOs you play, the quicker you hit this particular speed bump. i can't begin to count how many times i've killed x number of y to acquire z number of whatever to turn into some NPC.
seriously... no idea. hundreds? probably. i bet i've slaughtered generations of virtual rats, skeletons, zombies, and numerous other woodland creatures and denizens of evil. we're talking millions. that's a lot of virtual blood on my hands.
fortunately, i've got lots of virtual soap. and no virtual conscience whatsoever.
but what's it all for? some people are quite satisfied by the boundless extermination of mobs in search for some piece of leet gear or the xp required for that next level. but repetition like that only produces one result in yours truly:
boredom.
so, in the past, i'd burn out on a game and then find myself thinking, "hey! time for a new game."
that works a few times well enough, but i've played a lot of MMOs by now, and it's always the same.
"yay! new game! yay! new level! yay! new power!... yay... next level... yay... new gear... yay... next level... yawn..."
i find i really enjoy the feeling of accomplishment. intrinsic to this sense of accomplishment is the idea that i'm closer to my goal than i was before i began. my goal, of course, is to finish. to get to that point when you know you've done everything there is to be done and say, "aha! i've done it all!" MMOs, however, are not to be completed. even if you take every possible character class in the game to the level cap and stock them with all the best possible gear and work up every possible skill and craft and hobby and whatever else is available, there's an imminent update, adding more classes, skills, etc. somewhere along the journey of attempting such a feat, you may notice that you're physically spending your time doing this:
1, 2, 4, 5, 3, 6, 1, 2, 4, 3, 5, oh! low health! 7! 7!... 1, 2, 4, 5, 3, 6...
yeah... monotony for the lose.
there will never be an online game created that actually offers players the opportunity to achieve a point of absolute completion. it would directly oppose the idea that a game should continue to make money. i understand this, but for a long time i deluded myself into thinking this wasn't the case. i thought, "maybe this game is the one i've been looking for, the one which will provide my kind of fun." my kind of fun, it turns out, isn't MMO-friendly.
some aspects of MMOs i really miss, though. the social possibilities, however limited they might seem to an outsider, is one of those aspects. sure, most of the people you meet in-game might not be that great, but occasionally you'll run across someone who's actually pretty cool (see? just like real life). but paying $15 a month to maybe meet someone cool in a universe where you're strumming out the same numerical string on your keyboard over and over (and over and over and...) is pretty silly.
i still like games. i probably always will. i'm also willing to admit that they're almost completely a waste of time. sure, you gain a bit of spacial recognition, and shave a few seconds off your reflex time, and the endorphin rush has been found to help prevent Alzheimer's. but if i had spent half the time i've gamed on something less ethereal, like playing guitar or sculpting? yeah, i'd probably be a world famous artist or musician or something by now. and i like real world hobbies as well, but that doesn't detract from my appreciation of a good game. late at night, when the kids are asleep and the wife's watching TV on the couch next to you, it's not a good idea to try practicing the flute; logging onto a game, however, is a lot less likely to get you punched by your beloved.
i'll still try to get into beta testing for some of the upcoming MMOs which look like they might not suck after the first hour of play. what's better than free server time on a game that isn't yet available to the general public for a specifically allotted time? nothing, i tell you. NOTHING is better than that!
but i can't kid myself any longer. there simply isn't any reason for me to purchase and invest my time in an MMO any more. as fun as they are for a short while, i'm just not the kind of person who will commit for the long haul, and it's the long haul where the "fun" is in an MMO.
just not my kind of fun, i guess.
::shrug::
it takes my mind off of the rejection letters i keep getting.
i currently have 3 games i've been going between, all of which are single-player RPGs, so we're talking a lot of content in each. i'll probably complete most, if not all, of the content in all of them eventually, but i've come to the realization that my personality houses a bit of a paradox. i like to complete things, but i get bored when i do the same thing repeatedly.
this is exactly why i've grown stale on MMOs. it's impossible to complete an MMO, and you inevitably end up doing the exact same thing ad infinitum. it never starts that way, mind you. you get a shiny new universe with a shiny new avatar and a shiny new set of powers, with (more importantly) a shiny new set of abilities and/or gear to work towards. that last one is the hook, what the game developers hope will keep you coming back (and paying next month's subscription fee). so you begin happily enough, and they throw enough new stuff at you early on so that you've got new things to do and new spells/powers/skills to use while doing those new things to keep you very pleasantly occupied. after a while, though, the acquisition of your character's new upgrades decreases, and you become more aware of the repetition of the tasks you're doing in-game. the more MMOs you play, the quicker you hit this particular speed bump. i can't begin to count how many times i've killed x number of y to acquire z number of whatever to turn into some NPC.
seriously... no idea. hundreds? probably. i bet i've slaughtered generations of virtual rats, skeletons, zombies, and numerous other woodland creatures and denizens of evil. we're talking millions. that's a lot of virtual blood on my hands.
fortunately, i've got lots of virtual soap. and no virtual conscience whatsoever.
but what's it all for? some people are quite satisfied by the boundless extermination of mobs in search for some piece of leet gear or the xp required for that next level. but repetition like that only produces one result in yours truly:
boredom.
so, in the past, i'd burn out on a game and then find myself thinking, "hey! time for a new game."
that works a few times well enough, but i've played a lot of MMOs by now, and it's always the same.
"yay! new game! yay! new level! yay! new power!... yay... next level... yay... new gear... yay... next level... yawn..."
i find i really enjoy the feeling of accomplishment. intrinsic to this sense of accomplishment is the idea that i'm closer to my goal than i was before i began. my goal, of course, is to finish. to get to that point when you know you've done everything there is to be done and say, "aha! i've done it all!" MMOs, however, are not to be completed. even if you take every possible character class in the game to the level cap and stock them with all the best possible gear and work up every possible skill and craft and hobby and whatever else is available, there's an imminent update, adding more classes, skills, etc. somewhere along the journey of attempting such a feat, you may notice that you're physically spending your time doing this:
1, 2, 4, 5, 3, 6, 1, 2, 4, 3, 5, oh! low health! 7! 7!... 1, 2, 4, 5, 3, 6...
yeah... monotony for the lose.
there will never be an online game created that actually offers players the opportunity to achieve a point of absolute completion. it would directly oppose the idea that a game should continue to make money. i understand this, but for a long time i deluded myself into thinking this wasn't the case. i thought, "maybe this game is the one i've been looking for, the one which will provide my kind of fun." my kind of fun, it turns out, isn't MMO-friendly.
some aspects of MMOs i really miss, though. the social possibilities, however limited they might seem to an outsider, is one of those aspects. sure, most of the people you meet in-game might not be that great, but occasionally you'll run across someone who's actually pretty cool (see? just like real life). but paying $15 a month to maybe meet someone cool in a universe where you're strumming out the same numerical string on your keyboard over and over (and over and over and...) is pretty silly.
i still like games. i probably always will. i'm also willing to admit that they're almost completely a waste of time. sure, you gain a bit of spacial recognition, and shave a few seconds off your reflex time, and the endorphin rush has been found to help prevent Alzheimer's. but if i had spent half the time i've gamed on something less ethereal, like playing guitar or sculpting? yeah, i'd probably be a world famous artist or musician or something by now. and i like real world hobbies as well, but that doesn't detract from my appreciation of a good game. late at night, when the kids are asleep and the wife's watching TV on the couch next to you, it's not a good idea to try practicing the flute; logging onto a game, however, is a lot less likely to get you punched by your beloved.
i'll still try to get into beta testing for some of the upcoming MMOs which look like they might not suck after the first hour of play. what's better than free server time on a game that isn't yet available to the general public for a specifically allotted time? nothing, i tell you. NOTHING is better than that!
but i can't kid myself any longer. there simply isn't any reason for me to purchase and invest my time in an MMO any more. as fun as they are for a short while, i'm just not the kind of person who will commit for the long haul, and it's the long haul where the "fun" is in an MMO.
just not my kind of fun, i guess.
Monday, January 11, 2010
How To Play Your Job
i just finished reading [GM]Dave's posts regarding how a person should properly play an MMO. basically, it boils down to a few key points with which anyone would be hard pressed to disagree:
1) Research your job
2) Listen to the advice of others (apply any which actually makes it through your personal filter of stupidity)
3) Don't complain
sounds simple, right?
it is... which is precisely why it's so frustrating that so many players don't do it.
let's take it step by step.
i don't know about you, but researching a game is one of my favorite things to do.
seriously.
i know, i'm a geek.
i really enjoy reading through forum posts, websites, fan pages, whatever i can get my hands on that actually divulges decent information about different aspects of the game. likewise, i really dislike going into any situation completely blind. i would never want to be the guy who gets into a group and doesn't understand exactly what could be expected from me given the class i'm playing and how to deliver appropriate results to live up to those expectations. in other words, i don't want to be the retard in the group. to avoid this unfortunate incident from taking place, i'm willing to put the time required into actually learning about the game mechanics, the differences between the classes, and thus how to play the class i've chosen given the group in which i've placed myself.
unless you're playing a healer class, the expectations can be quite varied from group to group. sometimes, for instance, i've played a tank class which was expected to provide dps. or a CC class that was expected to play off-healer. it happens. it's good to be flexible in your expectations of a group so that when you're playing a dps class and someone calls upon you to play an off-tank you don't pop a gasket and start crying.
yeah, i've seen it happen. it's not pretty.
anyway, back to the subject at hand, let's say for the sake of argument that you've taken the time to learn how to play your class and what the specific situation calls for from everyone. for instance, showing up to fight the giant Turtle in LotRO without your poison resistance gear will get you ostracized. know this before you show up. if you don't know, for the love of mud, ASK! a person who doesn't know but asks will never be looked upon as a complete dolt... a person who shows up without knowing or asking always will.
so, you've done your research, and you've asked the right questions. this is all you can do (i'll assume you're not ignorant enough to complain about the group... that "Leave Group" button is there for a reason).
now, you have no choice but to leave it up to the leadership of the group to do their job and actually provide leadership.
leading a group of any kind is no easy task. due to my casual status as a gamer, i've opted out of leading many more runs than i have opted to take responsibility for the welfare and progress of the group's accomplishments at hand. i've noticed, however, that many people do not feel the way i do about providing proper leadership. i've been in more groups than i can count where the person who's nominated himself to run the show had absolutely no clue what they were doing.
::sigh:: many, many times...
...and then a few more.
as already stated, i don't play any game enough to know everything. many games i've played i didn't know much at all beyond how to hold aggro or nuke the right mob at the right time. but i know how to follow orders.
my question is this: if you take the time to get a group together, why in the world don't you take the time to figure out what, exactly, you need from the members of this group?
okay, the main tank just left the group before the boss, and now you need someone who isn't playing a tanking class to step up and try to hold the boss aggro. the healer bailed halfway through and now we're counting on the CCer with the minor heal and a whole lot of pots. i fully understand that these things happen in a game. what i don't understand is how someone can walk into a situation with everything they need to succeed except the actual knowledge of what needs to be done by those people.
i've mentioned before that my involvement in MMOs has dwindled to nonexistent recently. most of the time, i find i either play alone or experience utter defeat in the face of someone who tries to run the show but hasn't got a clue what they're doing. quite frankly, there are three kinds of gamers: 1) the uber-1337 hardcores without a real life or any social skills beyond the keyboard, 2) the kids who have no concept of group mechanics nor the basics of teamwork, and 3) me.
sure, i've been the weak link in the group before (read = the only one who doesn't put in 40+ hours a week and hasn't run the instance 20 times previously). if given the proper leadership (read = tell me what you need), i'll do my best and everything will go smoothly. i know, it sounds unlikely, but i've seen it happen more than a few times. more than that, however, it'll be some jerk who can't believe i would rather spend time with my wife and children than running a particular raid for some coveted piece of gear or some kid who doesn't have a clue how to run the instance in the first place and expects everyone else in the group to carry him through.
[GM]Dave has fought through this frustration and continues to play (feeding people who piss him off to a large purple dragon probably helps in alleviating this frustration). i, on the other hand, have opted to go back to Oblivion for the time being and hope a new game comes out which might offer a chance to meet better people within the population. the idea of transferring characters to a new server which may or may not be different just doesn't appeal to me.
1) Research your job
2) Listen to the advice of others (apply any which actually makes it through your personal filter of stupidity)
3) Don't complain
sounds simple, right?
it is... which is precisely why it's so frustrating that so many players don't do it.
let's take it step by step.
i don't know about you, but researching a game is one of my favorite things to do.
seriously.
i know, i'm a geek.
i really enjoy reading through forum posts, websites, fan pages, whatever i can get my hands on that actually divulges decent information about different aspects of the game. likewise, i really dislike going into any situation completely blind. i would never want to be the guy who gets into a group and doesn't understand exactly what could be expected from me given the class i'm playing and how to deliver appropriate results to live up to those expectations. in other words, i don't want to be the retard in the group. to avoid this unfortunate incident from taking place, i'm willing to put the time required into actually learning about the game mechanics, the differences between the classes, and thus how to play the class i've chosen given the group in which i've placed myself.
unless you're playing a healer class, the expectations can be quite varied from group to group. sometimes, for instance, i've played a tank class which was expected to provide dps. or a CC class that was expected to play off-healer. it happens. it's good to be flexible in your expectations of a group so that when you're playing a dps class and someone calls upon you to play an off-tank you don't pop a gasket and start crying.
yeah, i've seen it happen. it's not pretty.
anyway, back to the subject at hand, let's say for the sake of argument that you've taken the time to learn how to play your class and what the specific situation calls for from everyone. for instance, showing up to fight the giant Turtle in LotRO without your poison resistance gear will get you ostracized. know this before you show up. if you don't know, for the love of mud, ASK! a person who doesn't know but asks will never be looked upon as a complete dolt... a person who shows up without knowing or asking always will.
so, you've done your research, and you've asked the right questions. this is all you can do (i'll assume you're not ignorant enough to complain about the group... that "Leave Group" button is there for a reason).
now, you have no choice but to leave it up to the leadership of the group to do their job and actually provide leadership.
leading a group of any kind is no easy task. due to my casual status as a gamer, i've opted out of leading many more runs than i have opted to take responsibility for the welfare and progress of the group's accomplishments at hand. i've noticed, however, that many people do not feel the way i do about providing proper leadership. i've been in more groups than i can count where the person who's nominated himself to run the show had absolutely no clue what they were doing.
::sigh:: many, many times...
...and then a few more.
as already stated, i don't play any game enough to know everything. many games i've played i didn't know much at all beyond how to hold aggro or nuke the right mob at the right time. but i know how to follow orders.
my question is this: if you take the time to get a group together, why in the world don't you take the time to figure out what, exactly, you need from the members of this group?
okay, the main tank just left the group before the boss, and now you need someone who isn't playing a tanking class to step up and try to hold the boss aggro. the healer bailed halfway through and now we're counting on the CCer with the minor heal and a whole lot of pots. i fully understand that these things happen in a game. what i don't understand is how someone can walk into a situation with everything they need to succeed except the actual knowledge of what needs to be done by those people.
i've mentioned before that my involvement in MMOs has dwindled to nonexistent recently. most of the time, i find i either play alone or experience utter defeat in the face of someone who tries to run the show but hasn't got a clue what they're doing. quite frankly, there are three kinds of gamers: 1) the uber-1337 hardcores without a real life or any social skills beyond the keyboard, 2) the kids who have no concept of group mechanics nor the basics of teamwork, and 3) me.
sure, i've been the weak link in the group before (read = the only one who doesn't put in 40+ hours a week and hasn't run the instance 20 times previously). if given the proper leadership (read = tell me what you need), i'll do my best and everything will go smoothly. i know, it sounds unlikely, but i've seen it happen more than a few times. more than that, however, it'll be some jerk who can't believe i would rather spend time with my wife and children than running a particular raid for some coveted piece of gear or some kid who doesn't have a clue how to run the instance in the first place and expects everyone else in the group to carry him through.
[GM]Dave has fought through this frustration and continues to play (feeding people who piss him off to a large purple dragon probably helps in alleviating this frustration). i, on the other hand, have opted to go back to Oblivion for the time being and hope a new game comes out which might offer a chance to meet better people within the population. the idea of transferring characters to a new server which may or may not be different just doesn't appeal to me.
Thursday, December 17, 2009
The Secret World
Klingons and Vulcans won't do it. Jedi and Sith (probably) won't do it (although i'd be lying if i said i wasn't somewhat interested... it's Star Wars after all). But a Lovecraft-inspired universe of terrifying creatures & magic hidden outside the perception of an unsuspecting public which shuns the level/class structure, instead relying upon skill-based gameplay which focuses on single-player PvE content?
Yeah, that might just bring me back to MMOs.
Now, the bad news. First, you have to join a faction which you cannot change once it's been chosen. Not like the WoW factions which are basically just different starting cities & skins, but factions in which player attitude is (supposed to be) a driving factor. These factions boil down to three personality types: the self-righteous, the power-hungry, and the middle-of-the-road-balance-must-be-restored faction, which according to the population so far on the forums is by far the most popular choice. I always tend to play a personality type similar to my own in real life, so obviously i chose the last option (although it could be fun roleplaying either of the other two, maybe even more so... but who rp's in games anymore?).
Oh, and the second bit of bad news? It's Funcom.
Yeah, that's really bad. I know, i beta tested Age of Conan.
So why is this game grabbing my attention? The skill-based games that have been released so far have been utter disasters for yours truly (yeah, i beta tested Darkfall too). That, on top of the fact that's it a Funcom game, should have me running for the hills. So why do i care?
Well, first of all, they've admitted the Lovecraft angle. I'm a sucker for Lovecraft... his horror is some of the most amazing stuff i've ever read in the genre. If you're unfamiliar, check out the Lovecraft creature database and tell me that isn't prime material for an MMO. Second, the main developer stated there will be a huge chunk of content which will be solo-friendly for those of us who may or may not want to deal with the rest of the community (depending, of course, on how that turns out). Honestly, I can't imagine everyone will be running for this game given that there are other skill-based games out there already which (probably) left a very sour taste in the mouths of gamers and given Funcom's general reputation with MMOs after Age of Conan. This means the core population (read = those who continue to play the game after the first month's subscription runs out) could be a very interesting set of people... assuming the game's worth playing after the first month. There are just too many factors which can make or break an MMO, and i know enough to know that basing an opinion on a game of this magnitude in the first few weeks is somewhat unfair, but nonetheless i, like many others, don't have the patience to wait for a company to figure out what they should have figured out before beta while taking my hard-earned money to basically make me test their game ideas for them. I already have rather jaded views of most games that exist these days; they either copy the one formula which has proven to be the most financially successful, thereby offering yet another similar game to one which has already existed for 5 years, or they come up with something new and different yet don't support it properly (be it in advertising, hardware/technical issues, content maintenance, or in-game personnel). For me to be really interested in a game, it's going to have to offer something significantly different, yet be something that a person can log in a couple times a week and still enjoy, not feel like they have to grind a bunch of tasks just to get to the "fun" part.
Will The Secret World be it? Heh, probably not... but something compels me to want to play MMOs, and this sounds more promising than just about everything else that's been around this past year.
Yeah, that might just bring me back to MMOs.
Now, the bad news. First, you have to join a faction which you cannot change once it's been chosen. Not like the WoW factions which are basically just different starting cities & skins, but factions in which player attitude is (supposed to be) a driving factor. These factions boil down to three personality types: the self-righteous, the power-hungry, and the middle-of-the-road-balance-must-be-restored faction, which according to the population so far on the forums is by far the most popular choice. I always tend to play a personality type similar to my own in real life, so obviously i chose the last option (although it could be fun roleplaying either of the other two, maybe even more so... but who rp's in games anymore?).
Oh, and the second bit of bad news? It's Funcom.
Yeah, that's really bad. I know, i beta tested Age of Conan.
So why is this game grabbing my attention? The skill-based games that have been released so far have been utter disasters for yours truly (yeah, i beta tested Darkfall too). That, on top of the fact that's it a Funcom game, should have me running for the hills. So why do i care?
Well, first of all, they've admitted the Lovecraft angle. I'm a sucker for Lovecraft... his horror is some of the most amazing stuff i've ever read in the genre. If you're unfamiliar, check out the Lovecraft creature database and tell me that isn't prime material for an MMO. Second, the main developer stated there will be a huge chunk of content which will be solo-friendly for those of us who may or may not want to deal with the rest of the community (depending, of course, on how that turns out). Honestly, I can't imagine everyone will be running for this game given that there are other skill-based games out there already which (probably) left a very sour taste in the mouths of gamers and given Funcom's general reputation with MMOs after Age of Conan. This means the core population (read = those who continue to play the game after the first month's subscription runs out) could be a very interesting set of people... assuming the game's worth playing after the first month. There are just too many factors which can make or break an MMO, and i know enough to know that basing an opinion on a game of this magnitude in the first few weeks is somewhat unfair, but nonetheless i, like many others, don't have the patience to wait for a company to figure out what they should have figured out before beta while taking my hard-earned money to basically make me test their game ideas for them. I already have rather jaded views of most games that exist these days; they either copy the one formula which has proven to be the most financially successful, thereby offering yet another similar game to one which has already existed for 5 years, or they come up with something new and different yet don't support it properly (be it in advertising, hardware/technical issues, content maintenance, or in-game personnel). For me to be really interested in a game, it's going to have to offer something significantly different, yet be something that a person can log in a couple times a week and still enjoy, not feel like they have to grind a bunch of tasks just to get to the "fun" part.
Will The Secret World be it? Heh, probably not... but something compels me to want to play MMOs, and this sounds more promising than just about everything else that's been around this past year.
Sunday, December 13, 2009
Fin
I've logged thousands of hours playing video games.
At least.
I started tracking my gaming hours in June of 2006 using XFire (only PC games, console games not included) and I'm currently at 3,312 hours of total time spent playing video games. To some, this indicates a tremendous waste of my time (if you're of this belief, may i suggest lightening up a bit?). To others, this is only a month or two of casual gaming (seriously! check out this guy's profile). Like all things, amount of time spent gaming is a relative entity. My point is that i've gamed quite a bit in my life. In the past few years, most of that has been spent playing various MMOs.
I'll never forget the first time i logged into an MMO and began playing with other people... it was magnificent. People whom i'd never met before were somewhere else in the world unknown to me, but at that moment we all had that instant in common, united together under a common ruleset within a common server environment using super powers and earning xp towards our next level. My adrenaline and dopamine levels were at an all-time high, and i was hooked*. Looking back, there is still something incredible and indescribable about the feeling of joining a team of adventurers to tackle a feat greater than our individual abilities could accomplish alone. Quite simply, it was marvelous fun.
That feeling is still one i would like to enjoy again, but things have changed over the years. Sure, i've got more things in my life now which are a higher priority than gaming, but the crucial differences are not mine. The arena of MMOs has changed quite a bit, and it's my opinion that these changes make it more difficult for people like me (read = more to live for than the game) to enjoy gaming.
For one, the games have changed. There used to be a handful of MMOs to play, which meant that if you played an MMO, you only had a few options to choose from, and those games were all very similar in content and execution. GameOgre currently lists 47 pay-to-play and 61 free-to-play MMORPGs that are active as of the date of this publication. These games vary in content, targeted audience, style of environment, style of play, and just about every other possible facet of video games that you can conceive. According to a recent study, there are now over 47 million MMO subscriptions active in the world (10 million of whom are claimed by World of Warcraft, but of course there has been some debate regarding the accuracy of that number). When i began playing online, there were more like 5 possible MMOs and maybe 7 million total players (of course, i'm only guessing the number of players in 2005; if you can link more accurate numbers, i'd appreciate it). So not only has the industry been flooded with innumberable gaming choices, but the number of players has drastically increased. Most of these players are younger... and by "younger," i mean adolescents. Most of these games are targeted at these younger players... and by "games," i mean trite abominations. The mature player who wants to enjoy a challenging environment with other like-minded mature players in a casual manner is on the brink of extinction, if not completely annihilated already.
This is not a "boo-hoo-things-used-to-be-great-before-these-meddling-kids-ruined-it" post. Not in the slightest. Technologically speaking, the world today is a much better place than it was 5 years ago. Besides, things change; it's the nature of the universe, and i'm well aware of that (in fact, i'm quite the fan of evolution). Nonetheless, in the context of MMOs, the games just aren't being developed for players like me anymore. Casual 30-somethings aren't where the money is, i guess. It's understandable. The music industry hasn't targeted my demographic since long before i was born, so it makes sense that the gaming industry would take a similar turn. That's just the way it is.
"Well, Grey, if you're not griping, then what's the point?"
::ahem::
My point is simply that one of my favorite pasttimes is no longer. Something i used to love doing for 15-30 hours a week has become something i no longer enjoy even for an hour or two. It doesn't matter which game i'm playing, or which server i'm logged into, or what time of day i'm playing, or which guild/kinship/clan/supergroup/et al i'm a member of. The crucial elements, in fact the very foundation, of MMOs has evolved into something which just isn't fun anymore... it's become something more akin to a competitive series of chores. Whether you agree with me or not, one thing remains the same:
Greyfang is no longer a gamer.
Most of you won't even notice my absence, much less miss me. That's fine. But i miss the way it used to be, and i guess that makes me an old fogey. I'm rarely a nostalgic person, but MMOs used to be a magical opportunity for people to join together, having never met each other before, and have the time of their lives. I know of no other genre in which that is a possibility, much less a regular occurrence. To those gamers who know what i'm referring to, i say thanks for all the fun. Maybe i'll see you around somewhere. I'll be the one with the LFG tag.
*please understand that i use this term quite informally. i was never a video game addict, nor do i intend to make light of addiction in any of its varied forms.
At least.
I started tracking my gaming hours in June of 2006 using XFire (only PC games, console games not included) and I'm currently at 3,312 hours of total time spent playing video games. To some, this indicates a tremendous waste of my time (if you're of this belief, may i suggest lightening up a bit?). To others, this is only a month or two of casual gaming (seriously! check out this guy's profile). Like all things, amount of time spent gaming is a relative entity. My point is that i've gamed quite a bit in my life. In the past few years, most of that has been spent playing various MMOs.
I'll never forget the first time i logged into an MMO and began playing with other people... it was magnificent. People whom i'd never met before were somewhere else in the world unknown to me, but at that moment we all had that instant in common, united together under a common ruleset within a common server environment using super powers and earning xp towards our next level. My adrenaline and dopamine levels were at an all-time high, and i was hooked*. Looking back, there is still something incredible and indescribable about the feeling of joining a team of adventurers to tackle a feat greater than our individual abilities could accomplish alone. Quite simply, it was marvelous fun.
That feeling is still one i would like to enjoy again, but things have changed over the years. Sure, i've got more things in my life now which are a higher priority than gaming, but the crucial differences are not mine. The arena of MMOs has changed quite a bit, and it's my opinion that these changes make it more difficult for people like me (read = more to live for than the game) to enjoy gaming.
For one, the games have changed. There used to be a handful of MMOs to play, which meant that if you played an MMO, you only had a few options to choose from, and those games were all very similar in content and execution. GameOgre currently lists 47 pay-to-play and 61 free-to-play MMORPGs that are active as of the date of this publication. These games vary in content, targeted audience, style of environment, style of play, and just about every other possible facet of video games that you can conceive. According to a recent study, there are now over 47 million MMO subscriptions active in the world (10 million of whom are claimed by World of Warcraft, but of course there has been some debate regarding the accuracy of that number). When i began playing online, there were more like 5 possible MMOs and maybe 7 million total players (of course, i'm only guessing the number of players in 2005; if you can link more accurate numbers, i'd appreciate it). So not only has the industry been flooded with innumberable gaming choices, but the number of players has drastically increased. Most of these players are younger... and by "younger," i mean adolescents. Most of these games are targeted at these younger players... and by "games," i mean trite abominations. The mature player who wants to enjoy a challenging environment with other like-minded mature players in a casual manner is on the brink of extinction, if not completely annihilated already.
This is not a "boo-hoo-things-used-to-be-great-before-these-meddling-kids-ruined-it" post. Not in the slightest. Technologically speaking, the world today is a much better place than it was 5 years ago. Besides, things change; it's the nature of the universe, and i'm well aware of that (in fact, i'm quite the fan of evolution). Nonetheless, in the context of MMOs, the games just aren't being developed for players like me anymore. Casual 30-somethings aren't where the money is, i guess. It's understandable. The music industry hasn't targeted my demographic since long before i was born, so it makes sense that the gaming industry would take a similar turn. That's just the way it is.
"Well, Grey, if you're not griping, then what's the point?"
::ahem::
My point is simply that one of my favorite pasttimes is no longer. Something i used to love doing for 15-30 hours a week has become something i no longer enjoy even for an hour or two. It doesn't matter which game i'm playing, or which server i'm logged into, or what time of day i'm playing, or which guild/kinship/clan/supergroup/et al i'm a member of. The crucial elements, in fact the very foundation, of MMOs has evolved into something which just isn't fun anymore... it's become something more akin to a competitive series of chores. Whether you agree with me or not, one thing remains the same:
Greyfang is no longer a gamer.
Most of you won't even notice my absence, much less miss me. That's fine. But i miss the way it used to be, and i guess that makes me an old fogey. I'm rarely a nostalgic person, but MMOs used to be a magical opportunity for people to join together, having never met each other before, and have the time of their lives. I know of no other genre in which that is a possibility, much less a regular occurrence. To those gamers who know what i'm referring to, i say thanks for all the fun. Maybe i'll see you around somewhere. I'll be the one with the LFG tag.
*please understand that i use this term quite informally. i was never a video game addict, nor do i intend to make light of addiction in any of its varied forms.
Sunday, November 29, 2009
days like these
interesting times ahead for yours truly.
besides the obvious holiday weirdness, that is.
beside the "joy" of Christmas (read = staying up until 2am assembling all the toys we buy for my 3-year-old son just to be awakened 2 hours later so that we can disassemble them in a flurry of Christmas-cookie-induced destruction), we also have my son's birthday (read = more "joy" similar to Christmas). we also have my graduation ceremony.
that's right. Greyfang will finally be officially receiving his bachelor's diploma next week. while this sounds awesome, the reality of it is that i'm still looking for a new job in my chosen career (after sending out something like 50+ applications, and that's not an exaggeration) as the deadline for having to begin repaying my student loans draws distressingly closer. i know the job market right now is rather less than ideal, but i took that into consideration when choosing my major. you see, i chose one of the most "in demand" occupational tracks, with the hopes that as long as i earned excellent grades, i would have no problem finding a job.
my grades are excellent. a 3.97 GPA with multiple Dean's List and President's List honors. 10 awards out of 10 semesters, in fact. basically, one poor midterm aside, i had a perfect 4-year record at college.
only now am i discovering that it doesn't mean a hill of beans. you see, my major is IT. IT jobs are easy to find if you have IT experience. unfortunately, they're almost impossible to get if you don't. i have faith that you can quickly discern the Catch-22 of this situation. can't get a job without experience, can't get experience without a job. this leaves one very hopeful Greyfang who is slowly becoming disgruntled, even though my academic record shows that i bust my hump every day in order to achieve academic perfection.
just for kicks, i even tried applying at Best Buy as a PC tech. you ever talk to the PC techs at Best Buy? they're clueless. don't believe me? there are more than a few people out there who agree with me. like this guy. and this guy. and this guy. (i'll stop here, but the list goes on and on). don't blame the techs, though... it's the corporate structure that insists to the general consumer public that their employees are qualified to fix these problems while simultaneously offering zero training or education to those same employees. it's not their fault, they're just kids trying to make it through the day without getting yelled at by all those people who paid good money to have their PCs repaired only to be informed they need to purchase unnecessary parts, being overcharged for labor, then getting home to find their PCs still don't work correctly. but i digress...
so, i applied for the job (for kicks, really). the online application process took almost 30 minutes. no kidding. i'm rather shocked that these kids have the patience to get through it, which leads me to believe that the ones they actually hire for those positions are probably friends of some other employee based solely on the fact that they are young and will work for $12 an hour. anyway, i'm abundantly qualified for the position, and they're hiring at a new location opening close to my house. i thought i'd at least get a call back. i was wrong. chances are, they don't want someone not in their early 20s who actually knows anything about PC maintenance and repair. i'm not really disappointed about that specific job, but if i can't get a low-paying gig for which i'm qualified at a location which desperately needs people who actually know what they're doing, it doesn't necessarily bode well for me finding an quality job in the industry.
i'm trying to remain optimistic here, people. i really am.
besides the obvious holiday weirdness, that is.
beside the "joy" of Christmas (read = staying up until 2am assembling all the toys we buy for my 3-year-old son just to be awakened 2 hours later so that we can disassemble them in a flurry of Christmas-cookie-induced destruction), we also have my son's birthday (read = more "joy" similar to Christmas). we also have my graduation ceremony.
that's right. Greyfang will finally be officially receiving his bachelor's diploma next week. while this sounds awesome, the reality of it is that i'm still looking for a new job in my chosen career (after sending out something like 50+ applications, and that's not an exaggeration) as the deadline for having to begin repaying my student loans draws distressingly closer. i know the job market right now is rather less than ideal, but i took that into consideration when choosing my major. you see, i chose one of the most "in demand" occupational tracks, with the hopes that as long as i earned excellent grades, i would have no problem finding a job.
my grades are excellent. a 3.97 GPA with multiple Dean's List and President's List honors. 10 awards out of 10 semesters, in fact. basically, one poor midterm aside, i had a perfect 4-year record at college.
only now am i discovering that it doesn't mean a hill of beans. you see, my major is IT. IT jobs are easy to find if you have IT experience. unfortunately, they're almost impossible to get if you don't. i have faith that you can quickly discern the Catch-22 of this situation. can't get a job without experience, can't get experience without a job. this leaves one very hopeful Greyfang who is slowly becoming disgruntled, even though my academic record shows that i bust my hump every day in order to achieve academic perfection.
just for kicks, i even tried applying at Best Buy as a PC tech. you ever talk to the PC techs at Best Buy? they're clueless. don't believe me? there are more than a few people out there who agree with me. like this guy. and this guy. and this guy. (i'll stop here, but the list goes on and on). don't blame the techs, though... it's the corporate structure that insists to the general consumer public that their employees are qualified to fix these problems while simultaneously offering zero training or education to those same employees. it's not their fault, they're just kids trying to make it through the day without getting yelled at by all those people who paid good money to have their PCs repaired only to be informed they need to purchase unnecessary parts, being overcharged for labor, then getting home to find their PCs still don't work correctly. but i digress...
so, i applied for the job (for kicks, really). the online application process took almost 30 minutes. no kidding. i'm rather shocked that these kids have the patience to get through it, which leads me to believe that the ones they actually hire for those positions are probably friends of some other employee based solely on the fact that they are young and will work for $12 an hour. anyway, i'm abundantly qualified for the position, and they're hiring at a new location opening close to my house. i thought i'd at least get a call back. i was wrong. chances are, they don't want someone not in their early 20s who actually knows anything about PC maintenance and repair. i'm not really disappointed about that specific job, but if i can't get a low-paying gig for which i'm qualified at a location which desperately needs people who actually know what they're doing, it doesn't necessarily bode well for me finding an quality job in the industry.
i'm trying to remain optimistic here, people. i really am.
Thursday, October 29, 2009
just wait a bit
that's my life right now...
...waiting.
most people will tell you that waiting sucks. i like to think i'm a bit more philosophical about it (most of the time), and believe that it's an opportunity to introspectively reflect upon my contribution to the universe and my attainment of my personal goals which will result from the achievement of whatever the heck i'm waiting for at the time.
yeah, waiting sucks.
waiting for something which you have absolutely no control over sucks even more. the worst, however, is waiting for something that someone can control yet has made it abundantly clear that they're not even slightly interested in doing anything about it except wallowing in the torment of making you wait even longer.
that's where it appears i am right now. of course, i'm talking about my unborn daughter.
"wow, Grey, that's awful! how can you talk about your unborn daughter that way?"
allow me to explain. or don't, it doesn't matter to me. it's my blog and you can stop reading at any time; i'm going to say what i have to say (that's a joke, people... nobody reads my blog, i'm just keeping myself entertained over here).
you see, i know me. i know my wife. i know how we operate. we like messing with each other. it comes from living with someone who is just as bullheaded and obstinate as you are for well over a decade. it's inevitable.
this beautiful person who is currently residing inside my wife is a creation of our own genetic makeup. it's equally hers and mine, and therefore retains some of our characteristics while still essentially being a completely new person whom is entirely her own entity.
in other words, she's laughing right now. she's messing with us and enjoying every bit of it.
you see, my wife has these horrible contractions... horrible in the amount of pain they cause her, but the upside is that they indicate the imminent arrival of our little bundle of joy.
except that they aren't. my wife's been having these kinds of contractions for almost a week now. sometimes they get more intense, and come more quickly, leading us both to believe that the time has come to race to the hospital to wait there some more. then we get there, my wife stays in some room for a ridiculously long time, and then someone in scrubs shows up to tell us that it's not time yet, but they "won't be surprised if we come back later tonight in real labor."
that's happened twice. no "real" labor yet. just pain and more waiting.
i can't wait to meet my daughter, she's going to be a real chip off the old block. i'll probably even wait a few months before i start messing with her in the interest of fairness... but at this point i'm not making any guarantees.
...waiting.
most people will tell you that waiting sucks. i like to think i'm a bit more philosophical about it (most of the time), and believe that it's an opportunity to introspectively reflect upon my contribution to the universe and my attainment of my personal goals which will result from the achievement of whatever the heck i'm waiting for at the time.
yeah, waiting sucks.
waiting for something which you have absolutely no control over sucks even more. the worst, however, is waiting for something that someone can control yet has made it abundantly clear that they're not even slightly interested in doing anything about it except wallowing in the torment of making you wait even longer.
that's where it appears i am right now. of course, i'm talking about my unborn daughter.
"wow, Grey, that's awful! how can you talk about your unborn daughter that way?"
allow me to explain. or don't, it doesn't matter to me. it's my blog and you can stop reading at any time; i'm going to say what i have to say (that's a joke, people... nobody reads my blog, i'm just keeping myself entertained over here).
you see, i know me. i know my wife. i know how we operate. we like messing with each other. it comes from living with someone who is just as bullheaded and obstinate as you are for well over a decade. it's inevitable.
this beautiful person who is currently residing inside my wife is a creation of our own genetic makeup. it's equally hers and mine, and therefore retains some of our characteristics while still essentially being a completely new person whom is entirely her own entity.
in other words, she's laughing right now. she's messing with us and enjoying every bit of it.
you see, my wife has these horrible contractions... horrible in the amount of pain they cause her, but the upside is that they indicate the imminent arrival of our little bundle of joy.
except that they aren't. my wife's been having these kinds of contractions for almost a week now. sometimes they get more intense, and come more quickly, leading us both to believe that the time has come to race to the hospital to wait there some more. then we get there, my wife stays in some room for a ridiculously long time, and then someone in scrubs shows up to tell us that it's not time yet, but they "won't be surprised if we come back later tonight in real labor."
that's happened twice. no "real" labor yet. just pain and more waiting.
i can't wait to meet my daughter, she's going to be a real chip off the old block. i'll probably even wait a few months before i start messing with her in the interest of fairness... but at this point i'm not making any guarantees.
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
it goes both ways
i've mentioned i'm pretty busy lately (or at least that i'm tired, so you should have correctly concluded that i'm busy and not just lazy).
"you can't be that busy, Grey... you're spending time blogging, which is probably the most worthless way a person could spend their time."
yeah, you're right; the only grander waste of time is actually reading blogs. it's just that my readers mean so much to m...
::fits of choked laughter::
::gets breath back, heavily sighing::
i almost got that out without losing my composure... as if i have any readers (There are no followers yet. Be the first!). no, the truth is my therapist said i needed a creative outlet that doesn't involve blades and nudity. so, here i am.
anyway, i really am a busy guy. i work, i chase my 2-year-old around (who, btw, is upstairs harassing his mother so i prob should keep this short), i'm getting our house ready for another child due to arrive any day now, and i'm currently looking for a new job since having completed my bachelor's degree.
never mind the hours i put into video games.
so, i got a callback today. i can't say it went successfully, necessarily, although he does want me to come in and see him later this week. i'm just not sure i want to go see him. at least, not for the reasons he's thinking, anyway.
you see, there are a million places on the 'net that explain that interviewing for a job is a tough process, one in which you need to be careful of how you present yourself in all aspects. you need to look professional, your resume needs to be just the right format and without any grammatical gaffes, your interview needs to communicate to your potential employer-to-be just the right combination of confidence and humility...
basically, you need to sell yourself without appearing as if you're selling yourself while you're desperately trying to look like you're not desperate. it's a lot of hoop-jumping, to say the least.
but it goes both ways.
take this call i got today for instance. the gentleman on the other end of the phone informs me that he's looking to "immediately" fill this position. there's a red flag.
then he states that he's already spoken with many other possible candidates who weren't interested in the position for whatever reason. there's another red flag, and a pretty big one in my opinion. (which reminds me, why exactly didn't they contact me earlier? my GPA is outstanding and my resume indicates a decade of management experience, albeit not in IT. this is an entry-level position, so why the hell didn't he call me before now?)
finally, he explains to me again that he needs to fill the position as soon as possible. this is probably the worst thing you can tell someone in my position. you see, when i first answered the phone, this guy had all the power. he could have decided he liked me, thought i was worth giving a shot in his prestigious company, and i would have plugged away like a faithful servant to ensure that i got ahead in their company.
instead, he told me a) we need someone now, b) he's already spoken with at least a few others who didn't want the job (in this economy), and c) we really really need someone right away.
so now the applicant (that's me for those of you without outstanding GPAs) has more power than the interviewer. it's like an episode of Twilight Zone. he's let me know in no uncertain terms that he's desperate for a qualified candidate, any candidate, to merely accept the position.
what's wrong with the position? i don't know yet, i haven't met with the guy. but it must be something pretty big to have had such trouble filling it, especially considering it's an entry-level position and we're a bunch of grads w/o experience in the field. we can't really afford to pick and choose at this point. i intend to find out, though. maybe it's something i can live with. probably it'll be something i won't want. but it might very well be the only time in this interviewing process where i can feel like i'm the one in charge, and that experience, dear readers, is worth more than gold to a peon like myself, and i won't pass it up for anything.
"you can't be that busy, Grey... you're spending time blogging, which is probably the most worthless way a person could spend their time."
yeah, you're right; the only grander waste of time is actually reading blogs. it's just that my readers mean so much to m...
::fits of choked laughter::
::gets breath back, heavily sighing::
i almost got that out without losing my composure... as if i have any readers (There are no followers yet. Be the first!). no, the truth is my therapist said i needed a creative outlet that doesn't involve blades and nudity. so, here i am.
anyway, i really am a busy guy. i work, i chase my 2-year-old around (who, btw, is upstairs harassing his mother so i prob should keep this short), i'm getting our house ready for another child due to arrive any day now, and i'm currently looking for a new job since having completed my bachelor's degree.
never mind the hours i put into video games.
so, i got a callback today. i can't say it went successfully, necessarily, although he does want me to come in and see him later this week. i'm just not sure i want to go see him. at least, not for the reasons he's thinking, anyway.
you see, there are a million places on the 'net that explain that interviewing for a job is a tough process, one in which you need to be careful of how you present yourself in all aspects. you need to look professional, your resume needs to be just the right format and without any grammatical gaffes, your interview needs to communicate to your potential employer-to-be just the right combination of confidence and humility...
basically, you need to sell yourself without appearing as if you're selling yourself while you're desperately trying to look like you're not desperate. it's a lot of hoop-jumping, to say the least.
but it goes both ways.
take this call i got today for instance. the gentleman on the other end of the phone informs me that he's looking to "immediately" fill this position. there's a red flag.
then he states that he's already spoken with many other possible candidates who weren't interested in the position for whatever reason. there's another red flag, and a pretty big one in my opinion. (which reminds me, why exactly didn't they contact me earlier? my GPA is outstanding and my resume indicates a decade of management experience, albeit not in IT. this is an entry-level position, so why the hell didn't he call me before now?)
finally, he explains to me again that he needs to fill the position as soon as possible. this is probably the worst thing you can tell someone in my position. you see, when i first answered the phone, this guy had all the power. he could have decided he liked me, thought i was worth giving a shot in his prestigious company, and i would have plugged away like a faithful servant to ensure that i got ahead in their company.
instead, he told me a) we need someone now, b) he's already spoken with at least a few others who didn't want the job (in this economy), and c) we really really need someone right away.
so now the applicant (that's me for those of you without outstanding GPAs) has more power than the interviewer. it's like an episode of Twilight Zone. he's let me know in no uncertain terms that he's desperate for a qualified candidate, any candidate, to merely accept the position.
what's wrong with the position? i don't know yet, i haven't met with the guy. but it must be something pretty big to have had such trouble filling it, especially considering it's an entry-level position and we're a bunch of grads w/o experience in the field. we can't really afford to pick and choose at this point. i intend to find out, though. maybe it's something i can live with. probably it'll be something i won't want. but it might very well be the only time in this interviewing process where i can feel like i'm the one in charge, and that experience, dear readers, is worth more than gold to a peon like myself, and i won't pass it up for anything.
Sunday, October 11, 2009
::sigh::
well, i'm tired.
who isn't, right? but i'm really rather worn down. i thought once i finished my bachelor's degree, things would ease up a bit. as it turns out, i was wrong. again. meh, i'm getting used to it.
you see, i have a 2-year-old son. actually, it'd be more accurate to say that i have a lightning-ball-of-hyperactivity-who-looks-somewhat-like-me. he's amazing, i'm not even trying to complain, but keeping up with him is no easy task.
i know, i know... many of you are already saying, "but Grey, all 2-year-old boys are busy... suck it up."
yeah, you haven't met mine. my favorite thing to do these days is take him to somewhere where a few (not too many!) other parents are letting their kids play, like a playground, a park, or a prison yard, and unleash my boy on 'em. parents usually smile at me the first minute or two we're there, followed by a comment like, "oh! you're boy is a busy one too! ha ha!" then, after about 5 minutes, i start to get the looks. you know, the looks that basically say, "okay, what is your son on, exactly? is he dangerous?"
oh, you don't know that look? really? i get that all the time.
but the real fun starts around 10 minutes after my son has invaded the public play area. don't get me wrong, he's not a bully or a jerk to the other kids (although a little time at daycare has made him a bit less of a target for those kids who act that way), he just doesn't stop. ever.
EVER.
after about 10 minutes or so, parents start giving me that sympathetic look. that look that says, "ah, i understand why your eyes are glazed over and you look like you could drop at any minute." occasionally one will even come by (you see, by now they've all moved well away from where i'm sitting) and say, "wow, your son is a real firecracker, eh?" (read firecracker = insanely hyper to the point of abnormal and/or supernatural). i always smile, and keep most of my comments to myself, because i know that now, even though it's just a few of you, at least some of you people out there who thought you had a "busy" child now understand that you're actually blessed with a perfectly normal, healthy kid, while mine generates enough heat from his basic daily activities to keep Tibetans warm at night.
all of them. the entire country of Tibet. seriously.
so, why am i telling you this? is the point that i'm tired?
oh, not so fast... as tired as i am now, it only gets better.
you see, we've got another child on the way.
your reactions could go anywhere from "Yay! Congratulations!" to "well, who's fault is that?" i don't really care.
but as tired as i feel now, it will feel like a tropical all-expenses-paid vacation compared to the absolute physical exhaustion which awaits me in the near future.
that's right, the near future. as in the next week. maybe less...
::gulp::
again, don't get me wrong. i love my son, he's an absolute blast to be with, and i love being his father more than just about anything. i can't wait to meet the new child who will come screaming into my life any day now to take over that which has only begun to settle down since the first one arrived.
but i've begun to stockpile coffee. lots and lots of coffee.
who isn't, right? but i'm really rather worn down. i thought once i finished my bachelor's degree, things would ease up a bit. as it turns out, i was wrong. again. meh, i'm getting used to it.
you see, i have a 2-year-old son. actually, it'd be more accurate to say that i have a lightning-ball-of-hyperactivity-who-looks-somewhat-like-me. he's amazing, i'm not even trying to complain, but keeping up with him is no easy task.
i know, i know... many of you are already saying, "but Grey, all 2-year-old boys are busy... suck it up."
yeah, you haven't met mine. my favorite thing to do these days is take him to somewhere where a few (not too many!) other parents are letting their kids play, like a playground, a park, or a prison yard, and unleash my boy on 'em. parents usually smile at me the first minute or two we're there, followed by a comment like, "oh! you're boy is a busy one too! ha ha!" then, after about 5 minutes, i start to get the looks. you know, the looks that basically say, "okay, what is your son on, exactly? is he dangerous?"
oh, you don't know that look? really? i get that all the time.
but the real fun starts around 10 minutes after my son has invaded the public play area. don't get me wrong, he's not a bully or a jerk to the other kids (although a little time at daycare has made him a bit less of a target for those kids who act that way), he just doesn't stop. ever.
EVER.
after about 10 minutes or so, parents start giving me that sympathetic look. that look that says, "ah, i understand why your eyes are glazed over and you look like you could drop at any minute." occasionally one will even come by (you see, by now they've all moved well away from where i'm sitting) and say, "wow, your son is a real firecracker, eh?" (read firecracker = insanely hyper to the point of abnormal and/or supernatural). i always smile, and keep most of my comments to myself, because i know that now, even though it's just a few of you, at least some of you people out there who thought you had a "busy" child now understand that you're actually blessed with a perfectly normal, healthy kid, while mine generates enough heat from his basic daily activities to keep Tibetans warm at night.
all of them. the entire country of Tibet. seriously.
so, why am i telling you this? is the point that i'm tired?
oh, not so fast... as tired as i am now, it only gets better.
you see, we've got another child on the way.
your reactions could go anywhere from "Yay! Congratulations!" to "well, who's fault is that?" i don't really care.
but as tired as i feel now, it will feel like a tropical all-expenses-paid vacation compared to the absolute physical exhaustion which awaits me in the near future.
that's right, the near future. as in the next week. maybe less...
::gulp::
again, don't get me wrong. i love my son, he's an absolute blast to be with, and i love being his father more than just about anything. i can't wait to meet the new child who will come screaming into my life any day now to take over that which has only begun to settle down since the first one arrived.
but i've begun to stockpile coffee. lots and lots of coffee.
Friday, October 2, 2009
Christian, Jewish, Muslim, or Elvish?
i wasn't necessarily going to write anything today, but then i stumbled upon something that just begs to be the subject of opinion (in this case, mine). first of all, i should preface this discussion with the information that i do not judge a person for their religious beliefs whatsoever. Robert Heinlein said, "One man's religion is another man's belly laugh," and quite frankly i think that states it best. there are a lot of beliefs out there that might sound utterly ridiculous to you, but somebody is willing to stand up and say, "Yes, that's exactly what I believe!" with all the conviction of a little child explaining the imminent arrival of Santa Claus on Christmas Eve. who's to say what's right and wrong? that depends, of course, on the individual beliefs, and i'm not about to attempt to have a healthy and open-minded discussion about world religion on the Internet. i'd rather try to give myself a circumcision with a pair of nail clippers.
what? been done already? oh, well then... moving right along.
i should also preface this discussion with the fact that i'm a big fan of Tolkien. you know, Middle Earth? hobbits? those movies that swept the Oscars? i'm sure you've heard something of the author of that material, and i am one of those people who likes him. a lot. i enjoy reading quality fiction (that's right, there were books written long before those movies were released), and Tolkien fits my definition of "quality." some might even say that i like his work a bit too much. again, much like religion, that would be in the eye of the beholder (reference to the D&D beast of the same name only mildly intended... after all, where do you think much of what has become popular fantasy and roleplaying came from? that's right, people like Tolkien and Howard, but i digress).
i know quite well the difference between the Valar and the Istari. i also know the difference between Sindarin and Quenya (if i've lost you already, don't sweat it... knowing these things won't likely get you a date or a better credit rating). my point is, i might know more about Middle Earth and Tolkien lore than the average person on the street. agreed? great. let's move on.
"but Greyfang," (what kind of name is that, anyway? hush, that's a completely different topic, let's try and stay focused people!), "what does Middle Earth have to do with religion?"
excellent question! i'm glad you came to class today. my answer to that is:
i have no idea. honestly. what one has to do with the other (besides Tolkien's admitted influence from Catholicism, of which he was an avid believer) is quite beyond me. however, there are some who believe that Tolkien's Middle Earth is more than just well-written and explicitly-detailed fictional genius. some, in fact, believe that not only are the Elves of Middle Earth worthy of emulating on a spiritual level, but that they are actually reincarnated Elves. Elves. from Tolkien's Middle Earth. a fictional race of creatures living in a fictional universe created by an Oxford English professor...
absorb that for just a second.
still with me? cool.
allow me to introduce Tië eldaliéva. once you get past their affection towards Elves (their luxurious hair, delicate alphabet, and smoothly flowing spoken languages), you just might spot something rather bizarre.
these people claim to believe, and thus attempt to prove, that Tolkien's works are not fictional at all, and that they are actually Elves, either in spirit or in some form of "reality."
i know it probably sounds like i'm trying to make fun of these people. i'm not. my guess is that these are people who already have an immense amount of experience being made fun of by those around them. i can only assume it'd take a lifetime of being bullied before you convince yourself that you're really a reincarnated Elf who used to live in Mirkwood Forest, because you feel a true "connection" to the books.
look... the books were and still are quite popular. those of us who read and enjoy fantasy have a tendency to be a little different anyway... maybe a bit more creative? open-minded? or just downright nerdy? however you look at it, many people over the years have felt a connection to Tolkien's work, and understand that the Elves were (superficially, anyway) the coolest race on Middle Earth (personally, i'm a Dwarf man myself, but that's better left for another day as well). they had magic, they had awesome combat abilities, both ranged and melee, and they were functionally immortal. heck, they were sexier than vampires! everyone who read Tolkien felt a distinct sense of peace and beauty when it came to the Elves of Middle Earth. you know why?
BECAUSE TOLKIEN WROTE THEM THAT WAY!
look, Star-People or whatever you refer to yourselves as, i'm not trying to rain on your parade. you want to make Elvism a religion? you have every right. knock yourselves out. you want to spread the good word of Elvish intentions on the 'net? sure, why not? have at it. but when you post a statement like:
"Also, much to our surprise, there is also some exploration of the very real possibility of Elven genetics or biology, or in other words, Elf blood or DNA, due to legends of Half-Elven peoples."
you have to realize that you sound rather ridiculous. the legends of Half-Elven people? and, pray tell, from whence do these legends of Half-Elven people originate? oh, yeah! from Tolkien! so, because Tolkien (or should we just call him Eru Ilúvatar from now on?) said they exist... in Middle Earth!... there is a "very real possibility" that Elves exist in reality. sure... that makes sense, how silly of me to miss such a display of logic and evidence as this.
i genuinely hope that the Star-People find happiness in their beliefs, and maybe one day they even find their way home to Valinor to join in singing the Second Music of the Ainur. i really do. and, until then, i hope they find comfort and kinship with those who believe as they do.
what? been done already? oh, well then... moving right along.
i should also preface this discussion with the fact that i'm a big fan of Tolkien. you know, Middle Earth? hobbits? those movies that swept the Oscars? i'm sure you've heard something of the author of that material, and i am one of those people who likes him. a lot. i enjoy reading quality fiction (that's right, there were books written long before those movies were released), and Tolkien fits my definition of "quality." some might even say that i like his work a bit too much. again, much like religion, that would be in the eye of the beholder (reference to the D&D beast of the same name only mildly intended... after all, where do you think much of what has become popular fantasy and roleplaying came from? that's right, people like Tolkien and Howard, but i digress).
i know quite well the difference between the Valar and the Istari. i also know the difference between Sindarin and Quenya (if i've lost you already, don't sweat it... knowing these things won't likely get you a date or a better credit rating). my point is, i might know more about Middle Earth and Tolkien lore than the average person on the street. agreed? great. let's move on.
"but Greyfang," (what kind of name is that, anyway? hush, that's a completely different topic, let's try and stay focused people!), "what does Middle Earth have to do with religion?"
excellent question! i'm glad you came to class today. my answer to that is:
i have no idea. honestly. what one has to do with the other (besides Tolkien's admitted influence from Catholicism, of which he was an avid believer) is quite beyond me. however, there are some who believe that Tolkien's Middle Earth is more than just well-written and explicitly-detailed fictional genius. some, in fact, believe that not only are the Elves of Middle Earth worthy of emulating on a spiritual level, but that they are actually reincarnated Elves. Elves. from Tolkien's Middle Earth. a fictional race of creatures living in a fictional universe created by an Oxford English professor...
absorb that for just a second.
still with me? cool.
allow me to introduce Tië eldaliéva. once you get past their affection towards Elves (their luxurious hair, delicate alphabet, and smoothly flowing spoken languages), you just might spot something rather bizarre.
these people claim to believe, and thus attempt to prove, that Tolkien's works are not fictional at all, and that they are actually Elves, either in spirit or in some form of "reality."
i know it probably sounds like i'm trying to make fun of these people. i'm not. my guess is that these are people who already have an immense amount of experience being made fun of by those around them. i can only assume it'd take a lifetime of being bullied before you convince yourself that you're really a reincarnated Elf who used to live in Mirkwood Forest, because you feel a true "connection" to the books.
look... the books were and still are quite popular. those of us who read and enjoy fantasy have a tendency to be a little different anyway... maybe a bit more creative? open-minded? or just downright nerdy? however you look at it, many people over the years have felt a connection to Tolkien's work, and understand that the Elves were (superficially, anyway) the coolest race on Middle Earth (personally, i'm a Dwarf man myself, but that's better left for another day as well). they had magic, they had awesome combat abilities, both ranged and melee, and they were functionally immortal. heck, they were sexier than vampires! everyone who read Tolkien felt a distinct sense of peace and beauty when it came to the Elves of Middle Earth. you know why?
BECAUSE TOLKIEN WROTE THEM THAT WAY!
look, Star-People or whatever you refer to yourselves as, i'm not trying to rain on your parade. you want to make Elvism a religion? you have every right. knock yourselves out. you want to spread the good word of Elvish intentions on the 'net? sure, why not? have at it. but when you post a statement like:
"Also, much to our surprise, there is also some exploration of the very real possibility of Elven genetics or biology, or in other words, Elf blood or DNA, due to legends of Half-Elven peoples."
you have to realize that you sound rather ridiculous. the legends of Half-Elven people? and, pray tell, from whence do these legends of Half-Elven people originate? oh, yeah! from Tolkien! so, because Tolkien (or should we just call him Eru Ilúvatar from now on?) said they exist... in Middle Earth!... there is a "very real possibility" that Elves exist in reality. sure... that makes sense, how silly of me to miss such a display of logic and evidence as this.
i genuinely hope that the Star-People find happiness in their beliefs, and maybe one day they even find their way home to Valinor to join in singing the Second Music of the Ainur. i really do. and, until then, i hope they find comfort and kinship with those who believe as they do.
Thursday, October 1, 2009
introduction
so...
this is a blog, huh?
doesn't seem like much to me. just an empty page, really. not much to talk about here.
oh, wait... i'm supposed to be doing the talking? great. now you tell me.
i wouldn't mind so much, you know, the talking part... except that i don't have much to say. seriously, what do you want from me here? i'm just an average guy. well, alright, maybe not exactly average, but relatively average. yeah, alright, there's actually not that much about me that's average at all, really. i don't like football, or most televised sports for that matter. you know what sport i like? sumo.
no, seriously, i like to watch sumo. 2 huge guys politely trying to destroy each other? what's not to love?
i don't go nuts over whoever Hollywood mags say is the hot chick on the block. it's not that i don't like women, it's just that i don't find females with fake hair, fake tans, and fake breasts very appealing. yep, that's not very average i suppose. i don't go for those Twilight-y goth chicks which are the envy of high school girls everywhere either. yes, i'm aware that there is a movie based upon a series of books about vampires that many people seem to be quite enamored with these days, and i even like vampire stories... the original ones, that is. not these teen soap operas with a touch of horror chic added to them. you ever heard of Near Dark? now that's a vampire story: a bunch of blood-suckers rolling around the dusty Bible Belt in a trailor looking for hilljacks to waste. just enough realism to make it seem slightly plausible, allowing for that magical yet mysteriously elusive element which so many modern films lack, suspension of disbelief. no models dressed up as vampires looking for love... who wrote that crap? give me some hardcore down-to-earth undead any day and keep your romantically-inclined, misunderstood waifs with tormented souls and pomade-sculpted hair that only feed because they have to, but really just want to make a difference in today's evil world and just haven't found the right girl to save them from their own wretched existences...
wow, i should write a screenplay. i bet that crap would sell big time. what? already been done? oh, right. never mind.
this is a blog, huh?
doesn't seem like much to me. just an empty page, really. not much to talk about here.
oh, wait... i'm supposed to be doing the talking? great. now you tell me.
i wouldn't mind so much, you know, the talking part... except that i don't have much to say. seriously, what do you want from me here? i'm just an average guy. well, alright, maybe not exactly average, but relatively average. yeah, alright, there's actually not that much about me that's average at all, really. i don't like football, or most televised sports for that matter. you know what sport i like? sumo.
no, seriously, i like to watch sumo. 2 huge guys politely trying to destroy each other? what's not to love?
i don't go nuts over whoever Hollywood mags say is the hot chick on the block. it's not that i don't like women, it's just that i don't find females with fake hair, fake tans, and fake breasts very appealing. yep, that's not very average i suppose. i don't go for those Twilight-y goth chicks which are the envy of high school girls everywhere either. yes, i'm aware that there is a movie based upon a series of books about vampires that many people seem to be quite enamored with these days, and i even like vampire stories... the original ones, that is. not these teen soap operas with a touch of horror chic added to them. you ever heard of Near Dark? now that's a vampire story: a bunch of blood-suckers rolling around the dusty Bible Belt in a trailor looking for hilljacks to waste. just enough realism to make it seem slightly plausible, allowing for that magical yet mysteriously elusive element which so many modern films lack, suspension of disbelief. no models dressed up as vampires looking for love... who wrote that crap? give me some hardcore down-to-earth undead any day and keep your romantically-inclined, misunderstood waifs with tormented souls and pomade-sculpted hair that only feed because they have to, but really just want to make a difference in today's evil world and just haven't found the right girl to save them from their own wretched existences...
wow, i should write a screenplay. i bet that crap would sell big time. what? already been done? oh, right. never mind.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
